Am I the only one? (Read 569 times)

[sportsgirl]

Ladies, am I the only one whose husband is a slob? It is driving me nuts.. I don't have the time or energy to constantly clean up after him... Don't even look inside the garage, our patio is a mess and the patio table there is almost covered in stuff, his dresser is piled with clothes and his bathroom? I can't even go there...I love him dearly, but I need advice on how to get him to help.
So far my pleas for help haven't worked...

[Kpatch]

I don't have advice for you, but I do have a husband like yours. He's very personally neat, and thinks he cleans up after himself, but he doesn't. If it's in a pile, he calls it neat.

The worst part is the kitchen. I'm not a neat freak anywhere except in the kitchen and he makes such a mess when he cooks. Or eats. We have a marbled granite countertop that doesn't show dirt. So he doesn't bother wiping it down after he cooks. If it weren't for me, there would be a mountain of cereal crumbs on it.

Good luck and let me know if you find a solution!

[MrsM]

I am in the same boat. With hubby being gone I realize how much I clean up after him. He has a corner next to his chair that I refuse to touch and because of that it NEVER gets cleaned. Every few months I break down and clean it and find bowls, cups, pop bottles, napkins, etc. laying there. His idea of keeping it neat is putting a grocery bag there and putting his used kleenex in there and then the dog gets into and spreads it all over the house. His dresser is covered with stuff, his garage is a disaster and his work truck is a mess.
I feel your pain and I have no idea what to do about it. He takes his socks off in the middle of the living room and just lets them lay there. I could go on and on about his lack of cleanliness. I do my best to clean up after him, but it gets old really quick!
I thought by not doing his laundry and by not picking up after him he would get the clue, but he doesn't. He just wakes me up at 6 in the morning when he turns on the bedroom light so he can start a load of laundry. Grr...

[DancingDays]

My husband is the same way and, unfortunately, it's starting to rub off on me. Sometimes it gets so bad that the only way I can get motivated to clean is to invite company over. I'm not sure what I would do if anyone ever just popped by to say hello. We'd probably stay on the front porch the whole time.

But I can't complain too much. Even though he's quite messy, he still does all the laundry, so I can live with the mess. For a little while.

[sportsgirl]

Mine does at least wash the dishes several times a week, but there aren't many dishes with just 2 of us.

As for company, we just about have none.. Hubby's son is coming down for a week around July 4th... I have already given him 2 large jobs that need to be done before he comes... Let's see if even 1 gets done.

[rockfordfosgate]

I get so aggravated at my husband over this. He will take his socks off and leave them on the arm of his chair. He will just clutter up my kitchen counters with coins, screws/nuts/bolts, random car/tractor parts and just 'junk'. When he's off work on his 7-day break (yeah, he gets 7 days off in a row each month and we nearly kill each other by the third day. lol!), there is just no point in trying to clean up my kitchen or end tables in the living room. The most irritating thing for me is that he doesn't rinse out things before he puts them in the sink. A few seconds of his time for rinsing could save me a lot of scrubbing time and the lack of consideration in that non-action drives me up the wall.

[susala]

Perhaps it is time for all of you women to outwait your spouses. Let the mess become untolerable, but don't do anything. You are not your husband's parent!!! He is acting like a child...and, unless he moved right from his mother to you, he has at some point had to take care of himself. Clean one dish for yourself. If he wants to eat on a dirty plate, let him. Otherwise he needs to do his share.

Men can be real jerks. No offense to any of you men who aren't jerks.

[MrsM]

I've tried to out-wait him and he justs gets p.o.'d that I didn't clean. He will put dishes in the sink with half-eaten food on it. He doesn't it scrape it off. Ewww!!!!!!

[sportsgirl]

Messes don't bother mine either...It will only bother me and I am not a neat freak!

[rockfordfosgate]

I can't wait him out on some things, namely things in the living room where the girls will be. Now, if it's the clutter on his nightstand or our bathroom sink and his toiletry items, then it's more likely to wait until he does it (and he sometimes does on his own, just on a different time table than I would prefer) or I break down and do it. I'm okay with doing the majority of the chores; I stay at home so I know I will be the one to do the majority of it. He will help out when I ask for help with the bigger chores. It's the things like rinsing dishes before leaving them for me to wash later on or putting his socks in the laundry basket that he doesn't do that could *help* me by sparing me those few extra minutes. It's the difference between me and him ultimately. He's a 'big picture' person while I'm the 'small details' person. When we butt heads on something, that's what it boils down to. I'm learning to pick my battles as well. Getting upset over a non-rinsed plate isn't as important as it used to be. And he's learning slowly but surely to pick up after himself, at least some of the time.

[DancingDays]

Learning to pick your battles and let go of the small stuff is what being a grown up is all about. My husband knows that when I seriously need him to help, he'll do it in a heartbeat. It's not a matter of "waiting him out", it's a matter of "Is this really THAT important?". If not, I let it go. Just because it bothers me doesn't mean it bothers him and vise versa.

[sportsgirl]

It only bothers me when it seems to never get done...Then I get upset. Apparently though I am not alone with some frustration..Thank you all & I hope maybe I was able to help you vent on this also...

[MrsM]

I don't really say anything to him. I know it is petty in the grand scheme of things, and I am a stay at home mom so I kind of feel that it is my duty to keep up the house.

[ghoulgirl]

It must be a man/boy thing. All three of mine are like it! Lol

[Carla]

I probably shouldn't admit this, but I am the slob and my husband is the one always complaining about cleaning up after me LOL