Chapter Five
Shane took a few minutes to compose himself after he parked his car in front of the police station. Goodbyes were always difficult, but today's were particularly tough. First, he had said goodbye to Andrew, while Kim watched. The entire time, she had held Jeannie, the constant reminder of their failed marriage. Then, he had gone to see Eve, but she had been so distracted with rehearsing some new song that she barely heard a word he said. And, finally, there had been Kayla.
"Awkward" did not even begin to describe how he felt when Kayla had finally told him what he had longed to hear for so many months, all the while knowing everything would change if his mission was a success. He had tried to mask his confusion, but Kayla had known something was off. She just couldn't imagine what it was.
Taking a deep breath, he got out of his car and headed into the police station. He was not entirely sure why he was making this stop, but he just had enough nagging doubt that he wanted someone to know where he would be. Shane's faith in the ISA had taken a hit from the Jericho mission, and he wanted some back-up in the form of his best friend.
Roman seemed to be getting the morning off to a typical start as Shane knocked on the door to his office. He was shouting into the phone, and repeated the word "pal" at least five times in rapid succession. Shane waited until Roman waved him in, and closed the door behind him. After a few minutes, Roman hung up the call and looked at the ceiling in frustration.
"You'd think our evidence people would have finally figured out that they need to catalog what they get. How hard can that be?" He shook his head in disbelief as he calmed down, and focused on Shane. "So, partner, what brings you down here this early in the morning?"
Shane double-checked that the door was closed fully before he responded. "I've got a job that's going to take me out of the country. I wanted to let you know about it."
Roman pursed his lips. "Sounds serious."
"Yeah, it is." Shane pulled out the photo. "Before I show you this, I need you to swear that you never saw me today and, even if you did, we never discussed this."
"What's going on, Shane?" Roman raised an eyebrow.
"Swear it."
"Okay. I swear." Roman held out his hand and Shane passed him the photo. Roman examined it for an instant, before looking up, his eyes wide and mouth open. "Is this for real?"
Shane nodded. "Taken two days ago in Western Egypt."
"He's your mission?" Roman let loose a sharp whistle when Shane nodded again. "Wow." He handed the picture back to Shane, who put it in his inner suit pocket. "You tell Kay about this?"
"No," Shane answered.
"You have to, Shane. She needs to know about this."
"No, Roman, she can't know -- and you can't tell her. I could go to jail just for showing that photograph to you." Shane sighed and glanced back at the door to make sure nobody was close enough to overhear. "Look, I don't want to get her hopes up. Odds are that it's just someone who looks like Steve. If she starts to think he's alive and it's a false alarm, she'll be crushed."
"Or maybe you're hoping it's a false alarm," Roman muttered.
Shane winced as Roman gave voice to the thoughts that Shane had tried to suppress. He knew his friendship with Roman, as with all the Bradys, had been strained by his relationship with Kayla. He just never expected his best friend to be so blunt about it.
Roman seemed to realize that he had crossed a line. "I'm sorry. That's not fair. You're probably about to risk your life to find Steve. I shouldn't have said anything."
"No," Shane said. For some reason, he relaxed and felt like he could open up. "I understand where you're coming from. I can't deny . . . I won't deny that I had some thoughts along those lines, but if there's a chance it's him, I've got to try to bring him out." Shane looked away from Roman and stared out the glass windows at the busy station. "It's not like last time, when I had to choose between my brother and a friend. There's no choice this time."
Shane knew Roman would understand. He was the man Shane had betrayed by choosing to rescue his brother Drew and leaving Roman behind as Stefano DiMera's prisoner.
"So that's why you came to talk to me?" Roman asked. "So I know this time it's different?"
"Maybe," Shane said, not even realizing he was speaking aloud. "No," he corrected himself. "That's not why." Or maybe it was. Maybe he wanted Roman to think that he was trying to make up for that past mistake, but it wasn't the main reason. "I'm here because I think only you'll understand what I'm going to tell you."
"There's more?" Roman quirked an eyebrow.
"Yeah," Shane turned back and nodded slightly. "This mission . . . It's officially an unofficial, unsanctioned mission."
Roman froze as he took that in, then let out a long breath. "Does that mean what I think it means?"
"That depends on what you think it means."
"That if everything goes to hell, you're on your own," Roman said. "Have I got that right?"
"That about sums it up." Shane shrugged. "Not to mention that if word gets out afterward, I'll be drummed out of the ISA and probably arrested."
"Come on, partner, that's crazy."
"No, it's not," Shane said, his voice rising. "The Middle East is a powder keg. Or didn't you notice that we just fought a war against Iraq and have thousands of troops still there. With that going on, the ISA can't go around invading one of the few relatively friendly countries in the region." He lowered his voice. "The entire mission is my call. If I don't do it, the man in that photo stays where he is. The ISA probably wouldn't even have said anything to me, except Tarrington knew I'd be furious if they suppressed that information and I found out later." Shane could tell that Roman was once again thinking about the last time Shane had a choice about rescuing someone. "You of all people should understand."
Roman nodded slowly. "That's still a lot to put on the line."
"True," Shane said. "But Steve would do it for either of us, and it's not like he's going to say anything if I tell him to keep the mission a secret. Look, hopefully everything will go fine and I'll be back in a week."
"But you want me to know in case everything goes to hell?" Roman said.
"Pretty much." Shane knew Roman would understand. If the ISA tried to keep a lid on things by having all evidence of the mission destroyed, Roman would make sure that Andrew and Eve knew why Shane had disappeared. He did not want his children living a lifetime with that uncertainty.
Roman shook his head. "I don't envy you. You sure you've got enough manpower for this?"
"You volunteering?" Shane cut off any discussion of that subject before Roman could pursue it. "Don't even answer that. It's covered. Hey, like I said, everything will probably be fine and I'll be back in a week with a great war story--"
"That you can't tell anyone."
"Good point," Shane said with a laugh, glad to lighten the mood. "Listen, I'd better go. I've got a plane to catch."
Roman nodded. "You take care, partner, and watch your back."
Shane grinned as he headed for the door. "Always."