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Post by slyn11 on Mar 28, 2012 14:02:09 GMT -5
This had me spitting water!! Too funny
Philip is walking through the airport and he’s on the phone.
Philip: Just landed. I’ll meet you at the pier in an hour.
Brady: There is no pier.
Philip: Okay then, Java Cafe.
Brady: They trashed that set too.
Philip: The hospital?
Brady: Only if you want to sit in Daniel or Lexie’s office.
Philip: Hmm, how about ...
Brady: Nope.
Philip: And ...
Brady: Gone. Listen, meet me at the Horton Town Square.
Philip: Where the hell is that?
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Post by slyn11 on Mar 28, 2012 14:03:41 GMT -5
HORTON TOWN SQUARE Philip has arrived at Horton Town Square. He was looking around at all the unfamiliar shops and restaurants as he made his way toward the bench where he was supposed to meet Brady. Because he wasn’t watching where he was going, Philip walked right into a young couple kissing in the middle of the square. Philip: Sorry. Melanie: Why don’t you watch where you’re ... Oh my god ... um ... Philip! What are you doing here? Philip: Melanie. Um. Hi. I’m ... um ... meeting Brady. Who’s he? Melanie: Oh ... um ... this is ... Chad ... Dimera. Philip: You’re involved with a Dimera? Melanie: I’m involved with Chad. And it’s none of your business anyway. Chad: So ... this is Philip, the asshole you were married to. Philip: Didn’t your mother teach you to watch your language? Chad: Yeah, she did. After your mother taught her how to turn tricks. Melanie: Time out! Stop. Both of you. Philip: Melanie, can I talk to you in private for a minute. Chad: No you may not. Philip: I was talking to Melanie. Melanie: I agree with Chad. If you have anything to say, you can say it in front of Chad. But I don’t think we have anything to say. Philip: I guess not. Take care Melanie. Be careful. To be continued ... I would kill Madison to see this play out on the show. |
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Post by Kpatch on Mar 29, 2012 5:57:45 GMT -5
HORTON TOWN SQUARE
Philip continued walking through the Square to meet with Brady and he unexpectedly ran into Lucas.
Lucas: Hey bro!
Philip: Lucas!
Lucas: Hey man, why didn’t you tell me you were coming to Salem?
Philip: It was kind of spur of the moment.
Lucas: Looking good man!
Philip: Thanks. So are you.
Lucas: I meant me.
Philip: Lucas, have you seen my father and Maggie since you’re back?
Lucas: No, not yet.
Philip: How long have you been back?
Lucas: In real time, about 7 weeks. In Salem time, about an hour and a half.
Philip: Hmmm.
Lucas’s cell phone rings.
Lucas: I’d better take this. Could be important. We’re still on for that Bulls game, right?
Philip: Sure.
Lucas: See ya, man.
Philip continued walking through the Square to meet with Brady and he unexpectedly ran into Billie and Austin.
Billie: Oh my god. Philip?
Philip: Billie? Austin? Hey.
The three exchanged embraces.
Philip: You both look different since the last time I saw you.
Austin: She’s had work.
Billie: New hairdo. Makeup.
Austin: Different actors.
A few awkward moments passed in silence and the three siblings realized they have absolutely nothing to say to each other.
So Philip continued walking through the Square to meet with Brady and he unexpectedly ran into Kate.
Kate: Baby!
Philip: Mom!
Kate: Sweetie, what are you doing here?
Philip: I’m here on business.
Kate: I can’t believe that all my children are here in Salem.
Philip: No, All My Children was set in Pine Valley.
Kate: Sorry?
Philip: I think you’re forgetting about Cassie and Rex.
Kate: If only I could. Speaking of people I’d like to forget, you didn’t bring the slut with you, did you?
Philip: Don’t start with me.
Kate: Oh, I almost forgot about a meeting I have to run to. See you later sweetie.
To be continued ...
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Post by MrsM on Mar 29, 2012 7:36:13 GMT -5
Bwahahaha!!! Too funny!!
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Post by gapeach on Mar 29, 2012 7:44:18 GMT -5
Love IT!!!
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Post by DancingDays on Mar 29, 2012 8:27:38 GMT -5
Bwahahahahahahaha!!!! Love it!! ;D
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Post by mae00 on Mar 29, 2012 9:41:28 GMT -5
 I love it!!!! |
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Post by sportsgirl on Mar 29, 2012 9:46:11 GMT -5
 Love the line about Lucas complimenting himself!! |
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Post by djm on Mar 29, 2012 9:53:07 GMT -5
LOL about how Bille, Austin, and Philip say how different they look. Work, New Hairdo, New Actors. Then they have nothing more to say. So funny with Lucas back 7 weeks real time 1 and a half hours Salem time. The best was Kate saying all my children are in Salem and Phililp pointing out that All My Children was set in Pine Valley and that she forgot Cassie and Rex. Thanks for the get start to the day.
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Post by fluffysmom on Mar 29, 2012 10:27:07 GMT -5
This is the funniest chapter yet in this story. Loved it Kpatch. LOL at real time vs Salem time and Lucas complimenting himself. I loved Kated wanting to forget Cassie and Rex.
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Post by slyn11 on Mar 29, 2012 11:13:33 GMT -5
I am with Kate....Cassie and Rex don't exist in my world and hopefully never again on the show. They are the reason why I quit Days and mocked it extensively for years. Just the worst story I had ever seen.
Great update!
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Post by Kpatch on Mar 30, 2012 5:58:01 GMT -5
HORTON TOWN SQUARE
So Philip continued walking through the Square to meet with Brady. Finally, he reached the bench where Brady was waiting for him.
Philip: So what’s going on?
Brady: I stepped down as CEO of Titan so I could help my dad rebuild Basic Black, and Granddad hires this asshole named Ian McAllister.
Philip: Why didn’t he tell me?
Brady: I don’t know. I guess he thought you were busy with Parker.
Philip: Why didn’t you tell me?
Brady: You were off the show.
Philip: Still, you could have tried.
Brady: Sorry. I’ve been distracted.
Philip: With Madison?
Brady: Yeah. But it turns out that she’s married to that Ian dude.
Philip: What???
Brady: I fell for her hook, line, and sinker. And then she goes and pulls the rug out from under me.
Philip: Maybe she got tired of your overuse of cliches.
Brady: Oh well. Easy come easy go.
Philip: So, tell me about Ian.
Brady: Oh man, he’s bad news. He’s underhanded and violent and dishonest. [Imitating Madison] He is such a hateful bastard.
Philip: Why did your voice just get two octaves lower?
Madison: I was imitating Madison.
Philip: So why doesn’t Dad break the contract with McAllister?
Brady: He tried. But it’s iron-clad.
Philip: Hmmm. I need to talk to my dad.
Brady: Want to meet Ian first? Come on. I’ll introduce you.
To be continued ...
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Post by DancingDays on Mar 30, 2012 8:20:43 GMT -5
1. Benchie!!!!! 2. "You were off the show." - Bwahahahahahahahahaha!!!!! 3. Brady imitates Madison with a voice two octaves lower. - Awesome. I love it!!!!! Great chapter!  |
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Post by mae00 on Mar 30, 2012 8:37:45 GMT -5
OMG jkjpatch!! I didn't know if you would be able to top the hilarity of the last chapter but you did it again! I loved Madison's voice being two octive's lower that Brady's. Had never really thought about that until now. Aweseome chapter!!
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Post by sportsgirl on Mar 30, 2012 8:42:31 GMT -5
Of LOVE the use of humor in your stories... something the actual show seems to seriously lack!!
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