Jack and Sara : A New Beginning (Read 9,442 times)

[blueyed358]

chapters 35-36



Ben rode in the ambulance with Sara. She was sill unconscious but they had at least gotten the bleeding from her head under control. He had called Robbie and told him where they were taking Sara. His head was pounding but nothing mattered but her..she had to be alright . He could not even consider the alternative.



The newsroom was crazy , phones ringing , keyboards pounding and people trying to talk over one another. someone yelled " Jack..Jack..line two.." Jack answered the phone quickly , " Jack Deveraux..." Robbie took a deep breath. " Dad..It's Robert. " Something in the way his voice sounded made Jack uneasy. " What's wrong?..are you alright? " He tried to get the words out.." I am fine...Dad...It's Mom...she's been hurt. She is on the way to Mount Sinai. " There was nothing ..nothing but background noise. " Dad?....Dad..did you hear what I said? " Jack felt like he was hit in the stomach. All the air was sucked out of him , he eased himself down into a chair trying to catch his breath. " Yes..I heard you..how bad ... how bad is she hurt? " Robbie told him he didn't know any of the details but was on his way there now. " Ok...ok..I will meet you there. " Jack closed his eyes for a moment. " Oh god please..please don't do this." Then he was up and pushing the button to the elevator. " Jack..where are you going ? " Jack turned to see Alex Parker the assistant editor there. " Sara has been hurt.. I am going to the hospital.You are in charge..Get a photographer over to Penn Station..if one isn't there already. I will call you when I can. " Jack entered the elevator , his knees were weak, heart pounding. He could not lose her now..not now.



Robbie got there and found Ben in the waiting room. " Ben..how is she? " Before he could say anything Jack came bursting through the door. He saw his son and went to him...then he saw Ben . "How is she? " Then to Ben " What the hell are you doing here? " Ben looked Jack in the eye. " I came in with her. " Jack eyes went wide. " You WHAT ? " Angela came in next. " Jack !..How is she? " She said as she hugged him. Robbie answered. " No news yet. " Jack walked over to the desk, " My fiancee was brought in a little while ago..Sara Jamison..can you give me an update on her condition..and I wish to see her. " Jack was told that they were still working on her and he would be notified as soon as they knew anything. Now Jack wanted to know what Ben was doing with Sara. He walked straight for him, " Tell me..tell me what happened and how you came to be with her. " All eyes were on Ben now. He explained how he had thought too late about the possibility of the bomb being on the street not in the station.Then how he tried to get her to the command truck but they were standing about fifty feet from where the bomb exploded , sending them into the air and Sara slamming into a nearby truck. " First Robbie asked, " I don't understand , wasn't the area cordoned off ? " Ben nodded, " Yes of course." Then Jack jumped in , " Then what the hell was she doing inside the barricades ? You let her in there didn't you. " Ben sat down, " Not exactly..she came there with me." Ben sighed and told them how he was waiting outside the paper for her. " I had to apologize to her for my behavior the other night. " He said glancing at Robbie. He told them how he lured her with the new information. Jack was livid. " I can't believe you..you brought her into the danger zone. You could have gotten her killed . You stay the hell from her..you hear me? " Ben jumped up. " You are one talk Jack..You dragged her into that Alamain mess. because of you, two..not one..but two murdering lunatics kidnapped her and almost killed her. " Jack's heart stopped beating. He was right..not only were those his fault ..but he didn't stop her today. He willingly let her go out to the scene . He failed to protect her. Jack was backing away from him then stopped and as his eyes looked up to the ceiling he began shaking his head. " Oh that was good...quite ingenious in fact. It truly is no wonder why the FBI considers you a top profiler . You figured out my weakness and tried to exploit it. It almost worked..almost. " Then the Doctor came over " Mr Deveraux?" Jack answered quickly , " Yes..how is she? " The Doctor told Jack and the others that Sara had internal bleeding and that the were prepping her for surgery. She also had Edema or swelling of the brain. He assured them that they were doing everything that could be done and he would let them know when she gets out of surgery. Angela held Robbie's hand. He felt like a small child..afraid to lose his Mother. Jack placed his hand on his son's shoulder. " She is going to fine..I know it." Robbie looked at Jack and nodded , " She has to be. " Dean came in and his wife hugged him. They filled him in and then they waited. After an hour Jack began pacing , rubbing the back of his neck. Dean stood in front of him, " What do you say we go outside and get some air Jackie ? " Jack shook his head quickly " No..no..no I have to be here when she gets out of surgery." Angela and Robbie went to get everyone coffee and Dean sat with Jack , Ben was on his cell. " She has to be alright , Dean ..I don't what.." Dean put his hand on Jack's shoulder, " Don't go there ...everything is going to be fine..you'll see. " Another hour went by and the Doctor came out. " The surgery went well. We were able to stop the internal bleeding. Now we just have to wait and see about the swelling." The doctor told Jack they could go in a few minutes after she was brought to her room.



They entered her room and stared at her so small and still. Jack's heart fell , Robbie went to his mom and kissed her forehead. Angela squeezed her hand and Ben stood in the back of the room his eyes never leaving her. After about thirty minutes visiting hours were over and they were asked to leave. Robbie turned to Jack , " You coming ? " Jack shook his head , " No..I can't leave her. I will be staying here. Will you bring me a change of clothes when you return? " If he had not seen it before he saw it now. The depth of his father's love and devotion to his mother was staggering to him. He knew they loved each other but there was so much more in Jack's eyes that Robbie could not find the words for. " Sure..try and get some sleep though ..ok?" Robbie asked worried. Jack gave him a small smile , " I will try. " Robbie hugged him and then he left them alone. Jack fixed her blanket and stroked her hair. " You sleep now sweetheart , but don't sleep too long. We have a wedding to plan. " Then Jack's breath caught and he swallowed hard. " Sara.." he whispered , " Don't leave me..please..don't leave. You fight ..fight to come back to me and our son. I love you more than you could ever know..more then I did all those years ago. That is something I would have thought impossible. I have a confession to make to you. I never stopped loving you and I never will. " Jack held her hand and kissed it. He didn't see Ben standing behind the curtain listening to him , nor did he see him walk out of the room.



After some persuading Jack was given permission to stay in the room with Sara. He moved the chair over close to the bed. He turned the garbage pail upside down and moved it close. He kissed her softly on the lips and said, " Time for bed. I will be right here if you need me. I love you Sara. " Jack sat in the chair and propped his legs up on the pail. He took her hand and held it tightly. He sat with his eyes on her until they would not stay open anymore. Jack finally fell asleep, still holding her hand .



Robbie came in and stood watching his parents. Sara still unconscious and Jack sleeping in a chair holding her hand. After a few minutes he came in and kissed his mother's head. Jack sensed the movement and opened his eyes. " Good morning. " Jack looked at Sara then back to Robbie, " Not yet..It won't be until she wakes up." Robbie handed him a cup of coffee and a bag with some toiletries. " I brought you the clothes you asked for and a bit more..thought you might like to freshen up ." Jack smiled , " Yes thank you." After getting cleaned up Dean and Angela came by but Jack insisted they go to work and he would call them if anything changes.He tried to convince Robbie to go to his Homeland Security interview but Robbie had already rescheduled it. They both sat just waiting..waiting for her. " Robert...how are doing..really? Any ...problems now that you are home? " Jack asked with concern. Robbie sighed, " It's been ok..I have some trouble sleeping sometimes. It's like I feel like if I fall asleep ..I will wake up to find out THIS was all a dream. I ..also am having trouble sleeping on an actual bed. But other than that..." Jack gave a small nod , " Yeah ..I know a little something about that. It passed in time for me , but if at anytime you feel you need help..of any kind.." Robbie cut him off , " I won't hesitate..thanks. " Afternoon came and went and around dinner time Robbie asked Jack if he wanted to go out for a while and grab something to eat. Jack shook his head , " No..you go on ahead ..I don't want to leave her . " Robbie told him he would bring him back something. When he had gone Jack stood up and stretched. He sat on the side of her bed and talked to her. Then he paced, he was angry with her. His heart was heavy , he needed her to wake up but..he was so angry at her for what she had done. Going in the with HIM...how could she ..why did she? Those were things he could ask her when she she was feeling better. He sat back down resting his head on her lap , closing his eyes . Jack's eyes got heavy and he fell asleep. After a while he felt something moving lightly through his hair , he sighed, assuming he was dreaming. His eyes slowly opened to see her looking down on his with heavy eyelids and small smile. "Hi.." she whispered. His eyes filled with tears, " Hi there..you came back to me.." he said leaning up kissing her and brushing her hair back. " Surely you didn't think you would be free of me that easily. " Jack swallowed hard. " I don't ever want to be free of you..the fact is..I am only free when I am with you. Sara..I can't joke about this . I love you more than you could ever know. Without you..I am lost. I can't ever go back to living without you. " Sara caressed his face, " You won't have to..not ever. I have waited a lifetime for this..for you." Jack kissed her again. "There are things we must discuss.." Sara nodded slightly, " ..I know.." Jack rubbed his finger over her lips then over the dent in her chin, " But not now..when you are up to it..when we are both up to it. You just get better..because there is nothing on earth that is going to keep me from making you my wife. " Sara was starting to fall asleep , " What a coincidence..because there is nothing in this world that could stop me from becoming your wife. Only thing is.. " Jack frowned , " What ? " Sara let a small smile spread on her lips, "What will I dream about after I am Mrs Deveraux. I am that has been my one dream..so there won't be anything left to dream about. " He ran his fingers through her hair , " Oh I am sure I can give you something to dream about. Now ..let's talk about the name thing. " Sara frowned , " What name thing? " Jack smirked , " You know..the Sara Jamison Deveraux versus Sara Deveraux.." She smiled and pulled at him until he was laying next to her, her head on his shoulder " It's like John Mellencamp. " she said sleepily. He looked down on her , "Huh?" he whispered. " You know..when he first became really popular he was John Cougar. Then he wanted to drop his stage name and use his given name. So to get people use to it he started by becoming John Cougar Mellencamp. Then after a while he dropped the Cougar and was just John Mellencamp. See ?..That's what i am going to do. " Jack chuckled and he was about to make a comment but she was asleep. He lay there smiling..she was conscious and talking and that was all that mattered...for the moment.

[fluffysmom]

Great chapters. I'm so glad that Sara is okay. Jack's devotion was very touching. I loved Robert seeing that and realizing how deeply Jack really loves Sara.

[gapeach]

I am glad that BEN seemed to have finally gotten the message. Hopefully he will leave Sara and Jack alone and go find his own woman. Glad she woke up and glad that Jack didn't leave her side.

[blueyed358]

chapters 37-38


Sara had been in the hospital for four days and was finally released . " Now you sit there and relax" he said as he pulled the throw blanket over her . " I will go fix us some lunch .." Sara pulled him down to her and kissed him, " I am fine Jack..really. There is no need to fuss ." Jack caressed her shoulder. " it's no fuss.." When he left her son came to sit with her. " How are you feeling Mom ? I can I get you anything" Robbie said as put his arm around her. " Good..I feel good. don't you start fussing now too. " He looked at her , " I wouldn't dream of it..besides I think he has that covered . He was worried sick about you. Mom..you could have been killed . " Sara exhaled. " Robert..please..I will be doing this all too soon with your father I don't need to go through it with you as well. I was doing my job. " Robbie nodded and got up as Jack was coming back in , " No problem..but if you want to enjoy this life you wanted so much..maybe you'd better start thinking about changing how you go about doing that job. I have to go..I have that interview. " Jack put the tray on the table and handed her a cup of coffee. " What was that about ? " he asked. She only shrugged. They sat and ate in silence. Sara was waiting for him to start..but she guessed he was unsure because she had been so injured. Oh well.. best to get it over with. " Ok lunch was great..let's have at it. " Jack swallowed the last of his coffee. " Excuse me ? Have at what exactly? " She raised her eyebrows. " Ok..you up to it? You start it." Sara sighed , " Fine. I will not put up with you letting our personal relationship dictate MY career. You use US to keep me out of the top stories...or try to. I wont let you take advantage of.." Jack started laughing, " Oh that's rich...that would be the pot calling the kettle and all that. What were you doing inside the barricades Sara? " She opened her mouth but he went on. " I'll tell you what..you had to prove to me ..to everyone that you know what you are doing...only you didn't did you? What were you doing with HIM? Huh? tell me..tell me why you got in the car with him..You were so desperate to show me how independent you are ..teach me a lesson that you let your feelings make the choice for you. Not to mention the added access you would get because he was so desperate himself. If that was me and I was with Jennifer..oh that would be different wouldn't it. It's ok to get mad over her or the woman in the building but you just jump into the car with that hot head? " Sara stood up.. " I guess I don't need to say anything..you have all the answers yourself already. You have many valid points as to why I did what I did..but I didn't have time to do anything. The bomb went off maybe ten minutes after we got there. " Jack shook his head, " This isn't about doing your job it's HOW you do it. I will tell you something else as well..I want him out of our lives..out of your orbit. I have a bad feeling about him. You need to think long and hard about how you are going to do that and how you go about handling your professional life.. or I will. Sara's eyes opened wide , "OR WHAT Jack ? How dare you ..." Jack had turned his back to her now spun to face her. " How dare YOU! How dare you take our life together for granted . "





He walked up to her..inches away. " You don't need to prove your independence to me.. it is one of the things I love most. But your need to be front and center for every dangerous situation is maddening. You and I know how over protective I can be ..I concede that..but if you didn't go out of your way to put yourself in danger then would be able to do a better Job of controlling myself. You just don't understand. Since I lost you all those years ago..I have been trying to find that happiness again all my life it seems, but I never could.I don't even care how selfish this sounds but, now I finally have it and you back and I am not about to let your crazy ex-boyfriend or even you take it away from me again. So if you want to keep putting your life on the line..I am going to do my best to stop you..every time. " They stood looking at each other had Sara said, " First of all..I am not trying to get myself hurt but sometimes it is part of the job. I will do my job as I see fit not how you think I should. Oh and I see you left out your practically perfect in every way ex-wife . I mean it's not like she tries to seduce you or uses your history to tug at the old heartstrings...oh wait..she does do those things. " Jack shook his head , " You didn't hear a word I said did you? Either that or you just don't get it. Maybe ..just maybe if you could stop being so damn arrogant you might see this through the eyes of the people that love you . I am not the only one who has a problem with your reckless behavior. " Sara stood with her hands on her hips , " Oh PLEASE !.. I am not reckless." Jack shook his head, " You don't think that letting him get you alone and into the site was reckless? Maybe the fact that it was him was just the added twist of the knife for me then huh? " Sara ran her hand through her hair , " Don't be an idiot Jack !..I had an opportunity to be at the scene of a HUGE story and I took it. This is how I work and in case you haven't noticed..it's worked pretty damn good for me so far. Now I may not be perfect like your last wife.." Jack yelled loudly, " Will you please STOP..this has nothing to do with Jennifer..who is far from perfect I might add. This has to do with Ben and you and you recklessness , you either really can't see that or you just refuse to. " Jack walked away from and into his office slamming the door loudly. Sara jumped at the sound . She then saw Angela standing there. " I guess it's a bad time to look at the bridal magazines I brought over" Sara's eyes welled with tears and she flopped down on the couch. Angela came and sat next to her. Sara spilled it all to her. After she finished she looked to Angela and said, " He is not only being ridiculous but completely unreasonable..right?" Angela sighed , " Get out your calender and mark this date , I am about to say something I have very rarely admitted to. Jack Deveraux is right. You were stupid..and you need to put distance between you and Ben and not just when it suits you but even when there is a story involved. Honey..listen to me , Dean and I watched you go after every dangerous story that came your way after you lost Robbie. But that's over now..You are a well respected journalist , you have your son back alive and well and you have the man you have always loved and wanted back and he is crazy in love with you and dying to marry you. You don't need to be prove anything , to anyone including yourself. I always felt you took so many chances because you felt like you had nothing to lose . Now you have everything to lose. You need to think long and hard about all of this. I think your life has changed so much , so quickly that you haven't had time to adjust to it all. Just think about what I have said and what Jack has said ..ok? " Sara sighed deeply and nodded. It was a lot to consider .



Robbie brought home Chinese food for dinner. The three sat in the living room eating . " How did your interview go?" Jack asked. Robbie told them it went well. He could feel the tension between his parents. " Everything ok here? " he asked. Both nodded but said nothing. " Well I am going out tonight. I am meeting some of my old friends at a club. " Both Sara and Jack looked at him. " That's great honey..have a good time. " Jack looked from Sara to Robbie. " Yes ..have a great time. What time do you think you will be home." Robbie looked at him eyes wide. Sara looked at him like he was crazy. "Jack..he's twenty six years old. " Jack frowned , " I am well aware of that. I was just curious." Robbie tried to hide a small laugh." I am not sure..guess it depends how much fun I am having. " Jack nodded . Sara tried to stand up , she was still sore and had some lingering pain. Jack jumped up and helped her up. " Thank you" she said looking up to him. But Jack didn't make eye contact with her. " Your welcome. I have some work to do , I will be in my office. " Then to Robbie , "Robert have a good time..be careful." Sara watched as he went down the hall and closed the door to his office once again. " You two fighting? Because if I were him...I would be pissed off . " Sara turned quickly to face her son. " Oh would you now? " then she sighed again , " Robert do you believe that I am reckless ? " He did not have to think , " Yes I do. I have caught up on all the stories you did while I was....gone. How many times did you come close to dying Mom? What you did the other day , that was just plain stupid. He's right..you never should have gone with Ben and you should have went right to the barricades. You have to stop putting yourself into these situations , you might end up losing it all. Oh and while you know how I feel about Ben..I think it would be best for all of you if you kept your distance from him. He is never going to except that things are really over if you keep agreeing to talk to him. I am worried about his temper, I am not going to lie. If you must see him do it in public..ok? " He leaned down and kissed her head and hugged her tightly.



It was late and Jack still had not come to bed. She hadn't seen him since dinner. While she thought he was being childish she had to admit she would do the same thing. She always hid in another room when they had a fight. Sara crept down the hall but only heard the muted sound of CNN on his TV . She opened the door slowly and saw him laying on the couch watching TV. " Jack ? Aren't you coming to bed ? It's late. " He did not even look at her, " I am not tired . You go on to bed..don't bother waiting up. " She turned back toward the door , " Fine..I will go to bed. Goodnight " She closed the door and went back to bed , not sure if she was hurt or angry.



Robbie and his friends were having a good time . He had forgotten how much fun his friends were. He went to the bar and he saw a group of young college girls..he guessed. The girl on the end , her back toward him seemed familiar. There was a young guy hanging all over her. She was brushing him off..but politely. Then he saw her face..it was Abigail. He immediately felt protective and went over to them. The three other girls looked up and smiled at him seductively. " Well hello there." the brunette said. The one girl with dark black hair whsipered to the other blonde , " Wow.. look at his eyes they are beautiful." They guy hanging on Abigail went to the bar with his friend to get them all another round of drinks. Abby turned to see who her friends were gawking at. " Oh..Robbie..what are you doing here ? " The brunette touched Abby's arm , " Don't be so selfish Abby..aren't you going to introduce us? " Abby blushed , " Oh yeah sure , this is Nikki , Sam and Maddie..Umm this is my brother Robert. " They all gushed and Robbie smiled. " I am here with some friends and I saw you , so I thought I would say Hi. " As he spoke his eyes sought out the guy that was all over his little sister. He saw him taking something out of his pocket. " Excuse me a moment please. " He walked over and watched as the young man dropped something into one of the drinks. Robbie came up behind him . Abby watched as her brother approached her potential suitor. She liked the guy but he was a bit touchy , nothing she couldn't handle she thought. Robbie's friends were watching too and came up in case he needed back up. Abby could see him whispering in the young man's ear. Then he handed Robbie the drink and ran like a scared rabbit.



Robbie leaned in and whispered in the young man's ear. " I certainly hope that drink isn't for the pretty blonde you were groping a few minutes ago . As she is my little sister I would hate to have to explain this to my father. Oh and by the way..if you put your hands on her again..I will hurt you. You understand me ? " The young man nodded , saying not a word. " Good. I suggest you walk away now ...while you still can. " He took the glass from him and the guy took off. Robbie's friends were laughing , " I hope he didn't wet himself." Robbie went to the bar and told the bartender what he had saw and then pointed him out. Abby came over ..angry. " What was that all about? I was talking to him ! You have no right to scare guys away from me ! You aren't my father..you are barely my brother. " Robbie tried not to be hurt by her words , he knew she was young and was dealing with a lot of changes in her life. But he could not help himself. " Fine..I just did the same thing I would have done for any other girl. You really need to be more careful little girl , this isn't some small mid-western town. " Then he turned to his friends , " Let's go..the crowd is a bit too young around here."



The next morning Jack was gone earlier then usual and Robbie was still asleep. Sara decided to go down to the paper for a bit to collect her notes about the MIAs . She would work from home on it. She dressed and hailed a cab and made it down there in record time. People were looking at her, she knew her face was a series of bruises..old and new. She flinched a bit as she went to sit down . She saw everyone entering the conference room for the morning meeting. She entered and Jack looked up at her. " What are you doing here?" Sara frowned because he sounded so annoyed. " I do still work her ..don't I ? " Jack looked back down at his papers. He could not look at her , every time he did he wanted to grab her and kiss her and hold onto her as tight as he could. "Of course you do..I just thought you would take a few more days." As the meeting drew to a close everyone was handed assignment sheets. Sara tossed hers back on the table. " I am not doing that..that's research ..I am a REPORTER. Besides I am working on a story. " Jack raised his eyebrow , " Really? I don't recall seeing an outline by you on my desk. " Sara frowned , "I don't do outlines, I never have." Jack didn't even look up, "Well that will be changing. You will be required to do so from now on Miss Jamison." Sara's mouth hung open , her eyes roaming the room. They all looked so smug , they were all enjoying this. " Oh I don't think so .." Jack looked up now. Even through the bruises she was beautiful. Those bruises..a reminder of why he was so angry. He wanted to touch her..needed to. But he could not give in..this was too important. For her part Sara was feeling the same way. He was so handsome in his blue suit , making his eyes even bluer . as if that were even possible. His jaw was clenched..something she always found quite sexy. The tilt of his head , the crease between his eyes...she loved it all. While she was not ready to give in , she had been thinking on the things they all had said to her. Everyone else was leaving and Sara got up too. " Not you Miss Jamison..a moment please. " The rest of the staff started whispering as they left and Jack got up and closed the door. " I would appreciate it if you would not do that in front of the staff..it under minds my authority.If you don't like something..we can speak in private about it. " Sara shook her head , " Sure thing MR DEVERAUX....Perhaps you could not treat ME like that in front of them..they enjoy it too much. " Jack nodded, "Agreed..well I guess we are done here. " As he walked from the door she brushed past him . Both stopped , each throwing their arms around one another. They crashed into each other kissing hard and desperate, pulling each other as close as the could get. Then they broke apart, Jack stepping back shaking his head , " I have a lot of work to do." For reasons she could not understand those words hurt her. " Sorry to keep you. I am just going to grab my notes on the MIA and go back home. " Jack went back around his desk and sat down. " Very well. " She stood looking at him but he refused to look at her. As she was leaving he said , " See you at home..I should be home regular time." She closed the door as she left whispering , " I guess that was better than nothing."

[fluffysmom]

I really enjoyed the chapter. Maybe Sara will finally realize that she can't continue to be so reckless in pursuit of a story.

[blueyed358]

chapters 39 - 40



Jack came home regular time as he said. Robbie was not home for dinner so Jack and Sara ate in silence . Sara was thinking about the conversation she had earlier with Dean. She asked his opinion and he gave it to her ..shocking her. " Why do you think I went on all those assignments with you ? I had to make sure you came back. After Robbie was gone you got some sort of death wish. If you don't rethink your approach you are going to get yourself killed. Which in my opinion will just about kill Jack not to mention what it will do to your son and me and Angie. I have to tell you..you scare the hell out me..all of us. " Sara played with the food in her plate. She glanced over at Jack , who was reading some papers. " I wish you wouldn't read during dinner..it's rude. " Jack sighed and closed the folder then with his long fingers he shoved the papers off the table and continued eating. Sara stared at him. She was done..she shoved her plate away and Jack glanced p quickly. " If you are done eating may I go back to reading now? " Sara caught the small whimper before it came out. Did this even bother him ? Not talking or touching , being so distant and cold. She got up and was picking up her plate, then dropping it back on the table she asked, " How long are you going to stay mad at me? " He heard the catch in her voice , he looked up at her the rubbed his forehead. It broke his heart when she cried , because she didn't cry easily. " I am not angry Sara.." he spoke softly. " I am scared. I am scared that one day you are going to go out on a story and never come back to me. And that is something that I can't.." His breath was becoming shallow. Sara looked down at her ring, it was all she had ever wanted since the day the made love , to belong to him and he to her...now she had it.With tears rolling down her bruised cheeks she told him , " When I lost Robert..I was more than just devastated. I had lost everything. You see I had Dean and Angela..but they belonged to each other. I had Ben but.. I didn't belong to him. I made myself find a way to blame him for Robert's death , a reason to pull away from him. I had no one. I was alone in the world. If I were to die..three people in the whole world would miss me. So I guess I didn't really care what happened to me. The two people I had loved most in the world , loved with all my heart and soul were lost to me. I found every story I could and did anything I had to to get them. That photo..the one Dean took of me with the dead Marine..I will tell you the true story behind that. It's true our convoy came under attack, but what was not made public was that we were still under fire when I ran out to him. They were all yelling at me but ..I didn't care..I went out there and I cradled him ..waiting to get shot myself I guess. " Jack 's heart ached for her and her pain. " Oh Sara.." She came to him and knelled down before him. " Ok..your right..I have been reckless..you all have made me admit this to myself. I promise you..I will do my best to think things through from now on . I want to spend every minute of the rest of my life with you and I will NEVER take that for granted again. I am so sorry that you were so worried. " He pulled her up and into his lap. Kissing her and holding her close. " Shh..don't cry...You have me and Robbie and Jack and Abby now too. You belong to us ..to me and you need to take care of yourself.. for me when I am not there to do it. Sara .. we have the rest of our lives to look forward to..I just want as much time with you as I can possible get. I love you ..with everything that I am I love you." Sara started to sob , " I love you so much . " They sat there for a long time kissing and holding to each other. What they didn't know was that Abigail was just outside the doorway of the kitchen and had heard all of it. She knew now that she would not try to through her parents together again. She had felt like to accept Sara and her father was a betrayal to her mother but not to was a betrayal to her father and his happiness meant the world to her. She had to admit to herself now that her father loved Sara and she would at least try and get used to that. Abigail wiped her tears and moved back from the doorway and called out , " Dad ? Sara? you guys home? " They came out and Abby asked Sara how she was feeling. She watched as she looked at jack and gave a small smile , " I feel much better thank you." She asked if Robert was home. " I need to apologize to him," Jack tilted his head and the crease between his eyes formed "What for? " Just then Robert walked in. " Hey..is there any dinner left ? Oh hello Abigail..how are you? " Abby looked down then at Robert. " I came to apologize for last night. " Jack looked from his son to his daughter , " Somebody please tell us what's going on ..what happened last night ? " Abby turned from her father to Robert , " You didn't tell him what happened ? " Robert shook his head. Jack crossed his arms over his chest, " I am waiting ..what happened last night ? " Abby told the story then she looked at Robert , " The bartender told me that that guy had put something in my drink and you caught him. I acted like a spoiled little child. I want to thank you. I don't even want to think about what could have happened if you had not been there. " She walked over and hugged him. Robert smirked , " Hey that's what big brothers are for."


Jack had finally calmed down after Abigail told them what had happened the night before. He was proud of his son..and of his daughter for apologizing. Dean and Angela came by with bridal magazines, beer and little hot dogs. " Yay..I really needed these " Sara said. Jack offered to put them in the oven so Sara could sit and rest Abby was getting ready to leave but Sara stopped her , " Oh..do you have to leave? I was hoping ..well..I remember what you said on Thanksgiving but I was hoping that you might be in the wedding party. It would mean so much to your Father..and to me. I will certainly understand if you said no but I wish you would consider it . " Abby looked quickly at her father as he smiled sweetly at Sara and then looked to Abby. She knew by his expression he wanted her to say yes , but expected her to say no. " I don't have to consider it , " she said. " I would love to ." Sara smiled brightly as did Jack and that was confirmation enough to Abigail that she had made the right choice. " Really ? Oh Abigail that's wonderful...thank you. Can you stay and help me and Angela go through these magazines ? " Abby said she would and Sara turned to Jack, " I guess we should ask everyone else tonight too , you know get it over with. " She picked up the phone and waited . " Hello ? Adrienne..this is Sara..I am fine thank you...yes I know he was worried , but I am fine and we are starting to plan the wedding...yes it is exciting..I was calling to ask you..if you would consider being in the wedding party ? " Jack grabbed the phone from Sara . listening with a smile . " Crying..I knew it." Sara grabbed the phone , " Oh I am so glad..we are going over magazines now...yeah ..we can do that..ok I guess I guess we will see you in a few minutes. " Sara hung up and looked at Jack, "Adrienne wants to video chat so she can see the pictures too. You call Steve yet? " Jack shook his head, " Guess I can do that now. " Jack was nervous though he knew Steve would say yes.

" Steve it's Jack."

" Jackson ! What's goin on man ? How's Sara doin? "

" Oh she's fine thanks. We are planning the wedding and well..I wanted to ask you something"

" Ask away.."

" I was hoping you would be my best man. "

" I already am the best man , Jackson "

" Cute..seriously..It would mean..well it would mean a lot to me. "

" I am serious..I mean I sort of owe..you having done it twice for me.. Yea..yea I would be honored Billy Jack. "

" Great..great..thank you..I will call you when I find out what we are wearing. "

Jack was all smiles when he hung up with his brother , when turned around Dean stood looking at him . " What? " Jack asked. Dean stood arms folded , frowning. " Oh quit sulking, you are of course in the wedding party too. " Dean smiled , "Yeah..of course.. I knew that. You could have asked though."

Robbie stood watching them all. " Hey..what about me? " Jack and Sara looked at each other. Sara walked over to their son with a small smile. " You have the most important job. You have to give me away." Robbie sighed..all he could do is nod. He and Sara hugged for a few minutes. Then as he came around the couch he leaned over and whispered in Abby's ear " I am important . " When she looked up at him he winked at her. Abby laughed , " Oh get over yourself. "



After everyone left Sara found jack at his desk. Without looking up he said, " Everyone gone? " Sara entered the room. " Yes..Robert went with them , they are dropping Abigail off then going out to a diner. " Jack nodded , " That's nice..you get any ideas? " Sara walked up behind him. " Yes..we decided on red dresses and black tuxes. We saw some nice ones ..we will be going to shops this week. I have an idea about my dress too. " Jack nodded again, " Sounds great..I just need to go over this and I will be done. " Sara stood off to the side. "Oh ok..I was hoping to show you this outfit I was thinking of wearing after the wedding. " Jack put down his pen , " Sure..what do you mean after the wedding ? " Jack turned around to find her standing there in a white silk and sort lace corset with little white panties , garters and white stocking , white high heels and a silk robe left open and unbelted. "Whoa..Ahh..that is quite an outfit. " Sara smiled , " Do you like it? " Jack nodded , " Yes..yes I like it....a lot" Sara walked slowly over to him . " Maybe you should feel it..you know see if it is soft enough. " Jack smirked , " You are still injured ." She took his hand and placed it on her waist. " Shh..don't talk...feel." Jacks breath became shallow as he ran his fingers over the silk , his right hand came up and joined in. " Yes..it is..very..sort." He forgot about everything else but the feel of her. She lowered her head and began kissing him. Whispering in his ear. He moaned when her breath tickled his ear. "Jack..make love to me..I need you. " Jack removed her robe slowly, " I always want you Sara and I need you..always." he ran his hands slowly up her thighs and hooked his fingers around her panties and pulled them down slowly. She pulled him up and opened his pants and dropped them down to the floor. She lowered him back down to the chair and straddled him. He slid into her and she moved slowly at first . Then both forgot about injuries and everything else in the world. They were moving faster , grasping and holding tight. They kissed each other everywhere they could Sara bit his neck and he moaned , he filled his fingers with her hair and pulled her head back biting and kissing her throat, Sara called out his name as they came closer to the edge. He had his hands on her hips pulling her down on to him. Plunging himself deeper inside her. Sara wrapped her arms around his neck, burying his face into her chest. Both held to one another as the reached the final moment when they released , giving of themselves completely. Barely able to breath he asked if she was ok. " I have never been better. " she gasped. " Good..because I am far from done with you tonight. " Jack stood up and carried her to their bedroom. As he lowered her down onto the bed and stretched out on top of her she giggled , " I was hoping you would say that."

[fluffysmom]

Great chapter Blueyed. I am glad that Sara finally admitted why she put herself in danger all of those times. It was really good to see Abby apologize to Robert.

[blueyed358]

chapter 41-42

Sara sat at the table , magazines open , pictures of wedding gowns and bridesmaid dresses and tuxedos scattered about. Jack came in and set cup of coffee down for her, sitting next to her , " Having fun? " he asked. Sara looked up , " Is that what this is suppose to be? Jack this is very stressful. We have a few weeks to do this and we have to kick it in to high gear. I found dresses I like and I am going with Abby and Angela to have them try them on tomorrow. This afternoon I have an appointment to try on gowns. You need to order tuxedos. I would like you to wear black..I will the style choice up to you and the guys. " Jack sat smiling as she rambled on. " Oh..ok..so no powder blue tuxes..check. " Sara frowned. "Where do you think we should have the wedding, oh..and we need to pick invitations because they have to go out like yesterday. " Jack took her face in his hand and kissed her , "Whatever you want is fine with me...this is your day after all..it's all about you." Sara studied him , " No..no Jack I don't want it to be about me..I want it to be about us. So get that idea right out of your head ..You have to help me..plus I want your input. " Jack stood up and went behind her rubbing her shoulders. " You wish me to help? I tell you what..I will handle the booking of the location and the minister, limos and music and the tuxedos of course. You handle the ladies and the flowers, invitations and the menu. Of course I will discuss all choice with you before the final decision is made. Sound good to you? " Sara smiled sweetly, " Sounds good...and I will see to all the grooms " personal" needs as well. " They were still kissing when Robbie came in. " Well good morning Robert. " Jack said as he sat back down. " Good morning. " he said as he spread cream cheese on his bagel and poured himself some coffee. " You look tired" Sara said to her son. Robbie did not make eye contact. " yeah I am a Little. " Jack and Sara exchanged glances. " Well..I have a few things to take care of ...Robert I was hoping to get you and Dean to go with me for the tuxedos this afternoon. " Robbie looked up , " Oh yea sure that would be great. " Jack and Sara kissed and hugged and Jack said he would be back in a little while. Sara sat and watched Robert. " Talk to me..What's going on? " Robert sighed. " I am fine during the day. I have no problems , no anger issues , no depression , no panic attacks. But.." Sara placed her hand over his, " You can't sleep." Robert shook his head. " No I can't. I have nightmares. " Sara took a deep breath, " Ok..Ok so we deal with it ..I will find you a therapist." Again he shook his head , " No Mom..not yet. I mean I have been home barely a month..let's give it a bit more time. " Sara told him that he has been through a horrific ordeal for a very long. " I will wait for a little while..but if you are still having trouble in a few weeks then we will be handling it."

Dean and Angela arrived and they were all getting ready to head out when the bell rang. Jack answered the door to find a delivery man there with a large bouquet of flowers. " Delivery for Sara Jamison. " Jack turned his head sideways and called out, " Sara..it's for you. " Sara came to the door, Jack standing next to her. Sara looked at the flowers and handed the young man a five dollar bill, " Take them back. " The young man looked confused, " Excuse me? " Sara took a deep breath, " Take them back..give them to your mother, wife girlfriend whom ever..just take them away. " Then she turned to leave and Jack and the young stood looking at each other. Jack removed the card and placed it in his pocket. " You heard her...Thank you. " Sara was getting her coat on and Jack came behind her helping her with it. " A moment please." Sara blew out a breath, " Sure.." They went into the kitchen and Sara turned and looked at Jack. " I was going to tell you ..but you weren't speaking to me. I was going to tell you about it tonight. " Jack nodded..he believed her , she had never lied to him and she would know this was something he would want to know about. " How many times ? " was all he asked. " Two.. Once in the hospital and once since I got out ..oh well I guess today makes three. Trust me Jack..the best thing to do is keep sending them back. He wants me to acknowledge them. " He took her in his arms and kissed her , " You had better get going or you will be late." Sara looked up at him and squinted , " Please don't do anything foolish..just let it go. " Angela called out to her , " Sara come on we have to go. " Sara was waiting for Jack to respond. "Jack ? " As she waited for his answer she knew in her heart he would do something. She could only hope he would be smart about it. " Go on..Angela is waiting. " he said refusing to answer her. He so hated to lie to her. She was the only one in all of his life that he always tried to be honest with because no matter what he did, whether she agreed or not she would try to understand and see his point of view. Unless of course he was trying to boss her around. She shook her head kissed him again and was gone. The guys were waiting for jack when they saw him take the card out of his pocket and stare at it. Both tried talking him out of reading it. Then looking at his friend with a raised eyebrow he asked , " if you were in my position what would you do ? Just throw it out? " Dean frowned , " Ok..but don't get all crazy about it . " Jack opened it and read it. His jaw clenched but said nothing. " Well ? What does it say ? " Dean asked. Jack cleared his throat. " Sara , I love you so much.. Please I need to see you ... alone. I must be able to talk with you before you make a huge mistake. Since you are not returning my calls I an asking you to call me. If you do not..I will show up at your apartment. Think about it. All my love....Ben " Robert watched his father put the note back into his pocket. " It's obvious that Mom has refused to speak to him. I think she is right..just let it go. He is hurt and stubborn , he will come to terms with it..sooner or later." Dean added, " Robbie is right Jack. In a few weeks you two will be married and he will have to except it. " Jack smiled, " I suggest we eat lunch be fore we go.. there is sandwiches in the kitchen." When they went into the kitchen Jack took his keys and left. After a few minutes Robert went looking for Jack. He entered the kitchen with a worried expression. " He's gone. " Dean took another bite of his sandwich , then after he swallowed he said , " Get your coat..let's go. "


Jack pounded on the door. After a few moments Ben opened the door . " Hello Jack. " he said. Jack hit him i the chest with the crumpled up note. Jack pushed past him, " You and I need to talk."


" Oh Sara..you look amazing ! " Angela told her with tears in her eyes. Sara stood looking in the mirror. Yes..this was the one..this was the gown she would wear to marry the man she loved more than anything else. " I love it ! Yes..this this it..I will take this one. " They began taking her measurements and talking about veils and headpieces. " I sent Adrienne the picture of the dress we chose and she loved it! She is going to send me her size and have a tailor in Salem make the alterations. " Angela said smiling. " I hope Abigail likes it as well. " Sara said. Angela shrugged , " I LOVE it and that's all that really matters." Sara laughed at Angela's words. "True..Angie I couldn't do this without you. " The two women hugged and then Sara pulled back.. " Oh shoot..let's go..we have to go and check on Deveraux." As they hurried out of the shop Angela called out to her , " He's not THAT stupid...ok maybe he is."



" This has to stop. Not just for Sara's sake or mine..but for yours as well." Jack said as turned and faced Ben . As he closed the door Ben looked Jack in the eyes with a fake smile on his lips , " Gee Jack, I had no idea that you cared, I am touched." Jack chuckled and shook his head. " You really are something else Agent Todd. Sara and are getting married and and trust me when I say that there is nothing you can do to stop it. She loves ME..she wants to be with ME. Her decision..not yours..you need only to except that and perhaps you can retain a friendship with her. If you keep on this path you will ruin that as well. " Ben stood standing frozen, " I wouldn't say that there was nothing I can do. Maybe when she finds out she is marrying a rapist she will change her mind . " There it was again..Jack's past being thrown into his face..will there every be a day that would stop? Not that he still didn't feel that he deserved it on some level. " That's right Jack..I know all about it..I had hoped she would have found out on her own but..." Jack moved toward him. " She did..Sara knows all of my secrets. She knows all about my past and the things I have done in my life apart from her..as does Robert. So you see..you will not be able to use that..or anything else from my past to hurt us. Sara and I have no secrets. " Jack smirked, " She is in fact the one person in all of my life with which that is true. You will leave us alone. Robert is an adult if he chooses to maintain a relationship with you..well that is his business , but if you continue to try and come between Sara and myself I suspect you will lose that as well. " Ben looked down as was breathing hard . How could he have misjudged the situation so badly. " Let her go..you never truly had her to begin with. " Ben's head snapped up, he looked at Jack with hatred, " Who the hell are to say that to me? You don't what we had..what we meant to each other. She loved me..I believe she still does. The two of you are living a fantasy..you are trying to relive your past and when that comes crashing down she will come back to me. As I am sure Jennifer believes about you. Why don't you just go back to your wife and children now and save everyone the heartache." Jack shook his head, " You just don't get it. First of all..I have my children..all three of them. I don't need to be with Jennifer for that. Secondly..even if Sara and are were not together..which I must stress will never happen...she would still not come back to you. There is a reason she could never commit to you in the first place. She does not love you..not the way she loves me..not the way you love someone you want to spend the rest of your life with. You will never have that with her." Ben felt at that moment that he never hated anyone more. While there was a part of him..deep down..that knew what Jack said to be true..he still would not admit it. No Jack Deveraux ruined his life..no stole his life. A life he never even knew he had wanted until her . For the second time in that many weeks he snapped. Ben drew back his hand and punched Jack in the face. " I am not going to just hand her over to you..that's not who I am. " Jack pulled himself up and punched Ben back, "Stay the hell away from her..it's over." Jack headed for the door and Ben pulled him back. Throwing him down crashing onto the coffee table " You just hit a federal officer Jack." Ben grabbed Jack by his shirt and was about to hit him again when Dean and Robert came through the door. " Okay..that's enough. " Dean pulled Ben off and Robert lifted his father up. " What the hell is wrong with you two? " Robert asked looking from one to the other. He turned first to Ben , " Leave Mom alone Ben..it's over. I can't believe you would go after him like this.You could have seriously hurt him. " Then to his father , " And you..Are you out of your mind? Coming over here..alone." As they were leaving Ben whispered " This isn't over yet..not till I talk to Sara."



As the exited the building a taxis pulled up and Sara and Angela got out. Angela shook her head and looked at her husband " What an idiot..is he ok? " Dean assured her they were all fine. Sara approached Jack and he swallowed hard. Nobody saw Ben inside the lobby. Sara touched her fingers to Jack's swollen jaw. " You ok? " He nodded, " Yes..I am fine." Then she shoved him on him , " You just couldn't let it go..I told you..but would you listen ? No! " Jack exhaled loudly, " No ..I could not. I had to say something. " He stood staring at her and she smirked at him. " Can we please..both of us..try not to get any more facial injuries until after the wedding? I don't want to look like a couple of prize fighters in our wedding photos." Jack smiled and touched his hand to her cheek. " Agreed" Sara put her arms around his neck , " it isn't official until.." Jack leaned down bringing their faces inches apart , " We kiss on it. " They kissed for a long time and finally Dean said , " Let's go already..I am starving. Italian or Chinese? " Jack pulled his face back and hugged her tightly. " Not yet. I want to show you what I was doing this morning. If you agree ..there is yet another thing to cross off our list. " Jack herded them in the limo and they were off.



The limo pulled in and Sara looked at Jack puzzled. " Chelsea Piers? " Jack had a smug look on his face , " The Lighthouse at Chelsea Piers to be exact. Come along. " He opened he door and they all went inside. How beautiful it was , she thought. The views of her city were all around. The lights of city sparkling like diamonds in the night. It was perfect. " Oh Jack ! I love it ! We can have the ceremony here..a small string quartet maybe right there..and...Oh look at the dining area. This is exactly what I wanted. " She turned around and flung herself into his arms , " You are amazing..thank you for finding this for us. " Jack sighed, " Well I gave them a binder to hold the date..contingent on your approval of course. Let's go sign the papers and you and Angela can pick out the colors and menu, that is where I draw the line..ok? " Sara released him from her hold, " Yeah..of course as per our agreement.." Jack leaned down and touched his lips to hers, " I do love you so very much." Sara smiled , " I love you too. Let's go book our wedding Jackie ."

[fluffysmom]

Great chapter Blueyed. Agent Todd isn't going to give up so easily. I hope Robert decides to see a therapist soon.

[blueyed358]

chapters 43-44




Everyone sat around the living room eating Chinese food. Sara was in a very good mood . She had ordered her wedding gown and they had booked the location for their wedding and selected the menu. Jack had ordered the tuxedos and everything was going smoothly.Robert swallowed his Lo Mein and asked, " So tell me how you two started dating in college. I mean you told me the story of how you met.." Jack's eyes opened wide , " Sara ! You told our son..that story ? " Sara chuckled , " Oh come on Jack..that is a great story. " He shook his head at her. Robert laughed, " Seriously..that was a good story. I will think of you every time I see argyle socks." Jack squinted , " Oh you are hilarious. " Robert cleared his throat , "Come on ..I am curious how you went from friends to being a couple. From what I heard you were quite a player. Mom doesn't seem the type to go for that so.." Jack and Sara looked at each other. " This is the date story right?..This a good story too. " Dean asked. Jack sighed and put his arm around Sara, "Well before you start your story I would like to say that prior to this particular night I had gone out on a date the night before. The whole night I found myself comparing this girl to your mother. I kept thinking how she wasn't as smart as her , not as funny..well you get the picture. I kept thinking why was I wasting my time with this girl when I could be with her. So the next night I went to her suite in the dorm. Ok now you may tell your side , I will go get the coffee. " Sara watched him with a smile. " Ok so your Dad came over.." Dean added , " It was movie night. " Sara sighed , " Yes..it was movie night. So anyway Jack came over.."



" Hey guys..I have two bottles of wine and the two movies we wanted have you ordered the pizza yet? " Dean said he had not and they discussed toppings , Jack called out to Sara, " Hey..Sara what kind of toppings you in the mood for? " Angela took the wine from Jack's hands and told him , " She isn't going to be here..she has a date. " Jack stood staring at her , " What are you talking about ? It's movie night. " Jack went to Sara's room and walked in. Sara was zipping her dress up. " Oh hey Jackie..can you get the rest of this zipper for me please. " Jack did as asked ...

" Where are you going? "

" I have a date."

" But tonight is movie night."

" You can live without me for one movie night. "

Sara reached for her perfume and Jack stopped her and handed her a different bottle.

" I don't want this perfume..this is my everyday perfume. "

" I know that..THAT is your special occasion perfume. What do you need to wear that for? Who..who are you going out with anyway? "

" Pete Reilly"

Sara walked out into the living room looking for her shoes.

" Pete Reilly ? He's an idiot..he's a womanizing idiot."

All heads turned and stared at him. Jack looked at Dean and Angela, " What ? What are looking at me like that for?

Sara laughed , " Oh..I don't know , but the words pot and kettle keep coming to mind."

" That is different ! That's who I am out there..not in here with us..." the looking at Sara.." Not with you . "

Sara stared at him , " Jack what the hell is wrong you? Are you drunk ? "

" NO ! I ..I..I just don't think you should go out with him that's all. You don't even know him. "

" Sure I do..this is our third date." There was a knock at the door. Sara opened it and Pete came in saying Hi to everyone. He kissed Sara and she grabbed her purse. " See you guys later. " Jack followed her to the door , " When ? When will you be back? " Sara frowned " LATER.." Pete turned and looked at Jack , " Or after breakfast, " he said with a smile. Angela handed him a glass of wine. " Drink this Jack. " Jack flopped down on the couch. Dean looked at him with sympathy , "How long have you felt like this ? " Jack swallowed hard , " A while." Angela put her hand on his , " You need to tell her Jack." He shook his head , " If she doesn't feel the same I could lose everything. She will feel uncomfortable around me, then I will lose my friend too." Angela looked at Dean and he nodded at her to go on , " She won't. She has feelings for you too. That's why she keeps dating. You date..she dates. Just tell her ."



After the movies were over Jack had went to her room and laid on her bed. He could smell her on the pillow case and in the air her perfume had lingered. He finally fell asleep and around three am Sara came in. Jack heard them and woke up . He could make out their silhouettes in the doorway of her room . He was touching her, his arms around her backing her into her room as they kissed. Sara turned toward the bed , seeing Jack laying there she jumped. " Oh..Jack ! " Jack played drunk. Sara turned to Pete, " I am sorry.." He offered to help move him to the couch or they could go back to his place. " No, " she said with a small smile , " he will be throwing up soon and if I am not there to take care of him well..let's just say I don't want to come in here and clean up in the morning. " Sara walked over to him and kissed him , then pulling back she asked , " Rain check? " He nodded , " Sure..any time." After Pete left Sara sat on the edge of her bed staring at Jack. She moved the stray hair from his eyes and sighed his name. She undressed and climbed under her covers. Jack hid a smile and sighed too.



In the morning Jack rolled over and felt for her but she was not there. Sara came out of the living room carrying two cups of coffee. " I thought you could use this, how much wine did you drink? " He sat up looking guilty , " Sorry I ruined your date ? " Sara smiled , " No it's ... how do you know you ruined my date? You were passed out ...You FAKED IT ! Oh my god.."

" I had to , Sara..I had to . Don't you see ? I couldn't let you sleep with him."

" You couldn't let me ? Who the hell gave you the right to make that choice for me. I am the only one who gets to make the choice for me..not you or anybody else..just me."

" I didn't mean it like that . I meant ..I couldn't stand the thought of him being with you. The thought of any guy being with you..it makes me crazy. "

" You more so than usual ? I know the feeling though..I hate when you go out."

"You do ? Really ? "

" Yes..maybe you will remember that the next time you come in here bragging about your next date. "

" There isn't going to be anymore dates..I realized the other night , I didn't want to be with her or anyone else but you..you are the only girl I want. " He traced his finger down her cheek and ran his finger over the dent in her chin.

" I am open to that ..but..I HATE being lied to for any reason. I would never lie to you.. and if you ever lie to me again.."

" I won't..I won't ever lie to you again.. I swear. "

" Alright then..I want to be with you too..more than anything."

Jack smiled and pulled her to him into a kiss.

Robert liked the story , telling them they were "cute" which made Jack cringe. They all decided to call it a night, Robert telling them he wanted to hear more of their stories.They all went to bed. They were laying in bed Sara draped over Jack , " See that wasn't so bad. I left out the part where you went through my drawers and bathroom after I left looking for my birth control. " Jack laughed , " Yeah thanks for that. You also left out the part where we skipped classes and made love all day. I don't think we got out of bed until dinner time." Sara trailed small kisses up his neck to his ear , then whispering to him , " We may not be able to stay in bed that long anymore but.." Jack rolled over on top of her kissing her with desire , " We could still make love all night..or give it the old college try anyway .


Sara was putting breakfast on the table and Robert came in looking tired again. " Robert..did you get any sleep? " Robert pour himself some coffee , " A little bit...more then I have been . I think it's getting better. " Jack came in , " Morning you two. " kissing Sara he poured himself coffee. " I think we need to do laundry today as I am on my last pair of socks. " Sara smirked as she chewed, " I have plenty of socks. " Robert looked from one to the other, " I was going to do some laundry today I can run a load or two for you if you want. " Jack looked at Robert and winked quickly, " Don't be silly , laundry is women's work ..your mother will do it. " Robbie's eyes popped out then looked at his mother..waiting for it. "What was that? Jack ? What did you say? " Jack tried t hide his smile , " You heard me.. everyone knows a woman does the laundry." Sara opened her mouth then squinted at him. "Nice...you almost had me there. " Jack leaned forward and kissed her, " Well I will just have try harder next time." They ate and talked about the days plans. Jack was picking up JJ that afternoon after stopping by the office. Sara was going with Angela and they were to meet Abby at the dress shop. JJ had to fitted for his tux and Robbie offered to meet them there so he could take JJ ice skating again. " Are you sure? You don't have anything else you need to do ? " Jack asked. Robert assured him he did not. Sara excused her self as she wanted to do a bit of research before heading out. " Why do you do that ? Try to get her angry ? " jack laughed "I don't know..it's what we do , you know like how your Aunt and I act like we don't like each other sometimes..it's a game." Robert studied his father , " I use to stuff like that to her too..it's fun to see her get defensive and debate things. " Jack had a faraway look , " Sometimes it backfires though. " Robert loved getting insight into his parents past together , it helped him see how they came to be the people they were now and how they connected they still were after all the time apart. " Tell me.." Robert asked softly. Jack looked at his watch , " Ok..I have time for a quick story. When your mother and I met I was a bit of a chauvinist . We would have endless heated debates over it. So when we started dating I started making decisions for us. You know nothing earth shattering. To her credit she was being patient with me and I was coming around. One night I came over and she was really stressed she was working on a paper and I informed her we would be going out with some of my frat buddies and their girlfriends. She hated them and needless to say refused. I told her that I had already excepted and we were in fact going. A rather heated argument ensued. I gave her an ultimatum..bad decision ...."



" You know what Jack..I think you would prefer one of your air-headed society girls who can't decide on the color of their nail polish without you approval."

" At least with them every little thing doesn't turn into a debate or fight. "

" Fine..go call one of them to go out with you and your snooty friends . They would fit right in."

" You don't even try to get along with them. "

" In case you hadn't notice ..they treat me like I am beneath them."

" Nonsense ..that's your over active imagination."

" I think you and I need a break. Maybe we should just go back to being friends. "

"What ? What are talking about? I don't want to just be friends anymore. "

" That 's up to you..but I have decided we need a break."

" No problem , you want a break , you got it. "

Jack walked out and slammed the door closed. He met his frat buddies at the bar. Jack was getting fairly drunk , one of the girls Jack had taken out before, a beautiful blonde, sat with them and was getting very friendly with him. He tried talking politics and sports, current affairs and movies but she had no views of her own. She offered to take him or anywhere he wanted to go. He looked at her funny. " How about right here , in the parking lot? " She smiled shyly at him, " What ever you want , Jack." He told her that he hated the lipstick she had on , and she wiped off. " Better? " she asked. What the hell was he doing here? He didn't want a mindless bimbo. He had a beautiful , sexy woman who was his equal in every way . Someone to whom he could have a two sided conversation, she had thoughts and opinions and they were compatible in so many ways . Jack stood up and threw money on the bar , then to the young woman , " No thanks , I have everything I want . " As he was leaving he buddy threw his arm around Jack and said , " Nice to see you going for someone more you. You two look so much better together then you and your Brooklyn street rat. I mean sure she is hot. Tell me is she good in the sack..I bet she is , maybe I'll get myself a piece of that. I always wanted to tap that, a little slumming is good once in a while right ? " Jack punched him in the face knocking him onto the floor. " Slumming it ? That's what I am doing right now. As far as Sara is concerned you aren't intelligent enough for her and she wouldn't give you the time of day. Don't you ever speak about her like that again." jack ran back to Sara's and entered the room. She was sitting at her desk working on her paper. " Hey .." Sara barely looked up , " Forget something? " Jack came up behind her playing with her hair. " No..I missed you." He started kissing her neck and Sara pushed him back , " I said friends Jack, not friends with benefits. We need to go back to just friends first. " Jack sighed , " I don't want that." Sara turned back to the desk. " Well I am sorry for that..but I have made the decision . " So that's it? No discussion? No debate? " Sara swiveled in her chair and looked up at him. Jack's heart stopped beating. God she was beautiful. He knew in that instant he loved her and he could not lose her. " You said you didn't want to debate everything. I'm sorry Jack , I have a mind of my own..." Jack crouched down so that they were eye to eye. " I was wrong..I love that you have a mind of your own , I love that I can talk to you about anything. I have never known anyone like you." Sara looked away then back to him, sighing " I could have just explained about the paper I had to do , I didn't mean to attack your friends, I will try harder to get along with them." Jack shook his head " No , you were right about that too. " Sara frowned , " Why? Does it have anything to do with your swollen hand ? " Jack looked down at his hand. " Kind of..I don't want to talk about it. Just tell me...are we ok? " Sara slid her hand up his chest and around his neck and pulled him to her and kissed him breathless, " Yeah..we're ok"



Jack sat across from Robert with a sly smile, remembering the way they made love afterward. " Well I am going to say goodbye to Mom. I will meet you in about two hours? " Robert nodded , he watched his father leave and thought how his father was right . They were evenly matched in their intellect and personality traits but were different enough to clash and spark and that made him smile.



After eleven possible matches Sara hit upon a young man who she believed was the young man she buried. She would need to ask Robert about him and contact a friend at the Pentagon. Yes John Barone was the same age and height as Robert, she had a gut feeling she had found her MIA.

[fluffysmom]

I really enjoyed the chapter Blueyed. Thanks for the Christmas Eve chapter! I love the stories from Jack and Sara's college days. It's fun to see them when they were young and falling in love.

[blueyed358]

chapter 45-46


Sara made many phone calls and finally got the address for John Barone's family in Tuscon , Arizona. Sara stared at his photo and prayed she can do something for his grieving family. They would need a DNA sample from the parents to be sure of course but she did not want to do tell them over the phone . Sara would discuss it with Jack and get his thoughts on it.

JJ ran into his fathers arms " Daddy, Daddy..did you miss me?" Jack hugged his little boy , " I always miss you little man. " In the car Jack told JJ about their plans for the day. " So I have to wear a suit? Will it look like yours? " Jack told him it was going to be the same exact one and JJ smiled, " Cool. So I get to spend the day with Robbie? " Jack told him that they were going to meet Robbie now. " Good..he is a very good big brother. I hope we see Uncle Dean too..I want to beat him at HALO again. Where is Sara? Are we putting up a Christmas tree? " Jack had not even thought about a tree , Sara had not mentioned one either. He started thinking about their first Christmas together and he smiled, he had a great idea. They had arrived at the tuxedo shop and JJ got fitted . Jack told him how handsome he looked and JJ frowned , " The tie is too tight. " he said as he tugged at it. " It is going to make Sara so happy when she sees you all dressed up like me." JJ blew out a breath , " Fine..I will wear it to make Sara happy." Then JJ's face lit up , " Robbie !.." He jumped down and ran to him. Robert caught him and lifted him p into his arms, " hey buddy, I missed you. Don't you look great. You know what ? I think my Mom is going to cry when she sees you." JJ squeezed his big brother , " I missed you too !..Why would she cry? Daddy said she would be happy." Robert told him that she would be happy. Jack watched his sons interacted and he was filled with pride and love. Robert looked at him and could feel that just by the look on his fathers face. Each smiled at the other. When they were done Robert took JJ by the hand and left telling Jack they would be home for dinner. Jack decided to make a quick stop before going home.

Sara was in the laundry room, having decided to at least start some laundry. Jack called out to her when he came in. " I am in the laundry room. " Jack came in and stood in the doorway, " I was going to do the laundry while you were out." he told her. " Good..then I started it for you." He came up behind her. He felt so good..about her..them..everything. He wrapped his arms around her and started kissing her neck. " You are very sexy when you are doing menial household chores." Sara laughed. " Oh I am sure." " We are all alone you know." He bit her neck and and she moaned softly. There was no sounds but the humming of the washing machine. Jack pulled her shirt over her head and pressed himself against her back. " Jack.." His hands were roaming her body , and he tugged at her sweat pants dropping them to the floor, " Mmm, Sara.." He opened his own pants and pressed himself into her from behind. They moved slowly together, his hands on her hips hers resting on the top of the machine. The gentle vibration of the washer adding momentum to their own movements. They gradually started moving faster each calling out the others name. They could not finish this way, jack had to have her in his arms , facing him. He stopping kissing her neck , pulling back and spinning her around to face him. He lifted her onto the washing machine and they resumed , their lips locked on to each others , their hands moving in a frenzy grasping for each other and pressing so close together , not a space between them. Gasping for air each sending the other over the edge. " Wow..that was ...intense." she gasped. Jack , his face buried in her neck , chuckled, " Yes..we are quite..inventive. " When they had finally started to breath again and were redressed , Jack took her by the hand , " Come..I have something for you." Sara smiled , " You mean..you have something else for me?" Jack picked her up and slung her over his shoulder , smacking her bottom , " Very funny." He carried her into the living room and placed her on the floor taking her by the shoulders and turned her around . There was a huge Christmas tree in front of the window wall. She covered her mouth with her hand, "Oh Jack.." Jack wrapped his arms around her, " I remembered how much you loved having a tree so.." Sara turned around and hugged him and kissed him. Looking up into his eyes she told him she had not put up a tree since she had lost Robert."This is perfect.we can decorate it tonight..as a family.Maybe I can get Abigail to come over tonight as well..I will ask her when I see her. Oh Jack..This means the world to me..thank you." They stood in front of the tree kissing .


Abby hung up with her mother. Jennifer was going to be in the city for a few meetings regarding the paper. She was going to stop by to speak to her father and was hoping they could bring JJ to see Santa , together..since Sara was going to be out anyway. Abby felt bad for her Mother and tried to tell her that might not be a good idea. " Don't be silly baby , I am sure your Dad will be happy with the idea. " Abby was sure that Sara would not. Sara and Angela were waiting for her when she arrived at the dress shop. She watched Sara chatting with the Saleswoman , she was very happy Abby thought. " I hope you like the gown Abby. Listen..your Dad and I were going to have a little tree trimming party tonight. He would love it if you could come...we both would." Abby thought about , she also thought about being able to spend some time with her brother...both of them. " Sure..I couldn't be there until around seven..I am meeting friends for dinner , is that ok?" Sara said that was perfect. Abby had to admit , the red gown was lovely. They took measurements for Angela and Abby and Sara gave them Adrienne's . " Well I guess we will see you tonight then. " Sara said to Abigail. Abby realized that they were not there that long. She knew her Mother was probably just getting over to her Father's about this time. " Want to stop and grab some lunch? " Both the women had a surprised look on their faces but Sara smiled brightly, "That would be wonderful." Abby smiled back, feeling a bit guilty. As they left, Abby wondered if she had done the right thing.



Robert had taken JJ ice skating. They stopped and got hot pretzels from a street cart and were looking at all the Christmas displays in the store windows. Then Robert had an idea when the got in front of Macy's. " hey buddy..Want to go see Santa? " JJ got very excited. " Oh yes..can we please? I have a bunch of things I want to ask him. Can you ask him to bring things for other people too? " Robert thought about that. What other child would think of others when talking to Santa? " I don't see why not..who did you want to ask for? " JJ looked up at Robbie , " For you and Abby." Robert squeezed his little brother's hand, " I think I already got my present..I got the little brother and sister I have always wanted." JJ chatted the whole time they were on line and Santa's elf kept eyeing them and smiling at Robert. Finally she walked over to him. She was a very attractive young woman in her mid twenties with auburn hair and sparkling green eyes . " Your son is so adorable. " she said. Robert smiled, "He is totally adorable , but he is not my son..he's my brother. " She brightened up even more. " Oh..that so sweet." Her name was Katie. She was twenty five and a kindergarten teacher. Her mother was the manager there and had begged her to help her out today because she was short a Santa's helper. " It's a good thing I came in today then." Robert said. " Yes..it's very good thing." When they left both JJ and Robert had big smiles. JJ had a candy cane and Robert had a dinner date for the following evening.



Jack was setting up the the house for their tree trimming He had brought up the boxes Sara had requested and he had wine and Champagne chilling. He had hand food catered , even ordering the little hot dogs Sara loved so much. Jack wanted this to be perfect. The door bell rang and Jack answered it , finding Jennifer on the other side of the door. " Jennifer ...what are you doing here? " Jennifer smiled at him , " Hi Jack..I had a meeting with a possible new editor and I thought maybe we could take JJ to see Santa. " Jennifer walked in and looked around. She saw everything set up down to the roaring fire and Christmas music playing. " Oh..I am sorry did I interrupt ? " Jack told her that everyone was still out and they had plans to trim the tree that night. Jennifer smiled to herself, now she could spend some precious time alone with Jack. She had missed him so. Jennifer asked how the wedding plans were coming along. Jack told her all about the wedding. Her heart was breaking but she smiled anyway. She tried bringing up their weddings but could see that was making Jack uncomfortable and she didn't want to ruin the time they were spending together. " Well, I guess i had better get going..I have that meeting." Jack gave her some advice on how to handle the negotiations if she felt she wanted to hire him. " I wish you could come with me." She asked hopefully. Jack shook his head, " You will do just fine." he said. She thanked him and on impulse hugged him. Jack was pulling back and her arms were still around his neck when he saw her. Sara had come in and was standing in the doorway watching them. Jack's heart was racing , he could see the hurt and anger on her face. She had the wrong idea..he knew it in an instant. "Hey..your home." He went to her and kissed her, whispering, " This is not what it looks like." Sara took her eyes from Jennifer and looked at Jack, " What does look like Jack? Because to me, it looks like you are having a romantic afternoon with your ex-wife ... in OUR home." Jack shook his head , " NO !..no..she stopped by before a meeting, she wanted to see if I wanted to take JJ to see Santa. " Sara closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She knew in her heart that Jack would not do what she had accused him of. But she could not just brush it off. " Jennifer , we need some rules. I am telling..both of you, I do not want you just showing up here unannounced again. If you have business with Jack call first. " Jack brushed her hair off her shoulder then looked at Jennifer , " That would be best." Jennifer agreed. Sara frowned and then looked at Jennifer, " You knew I wouldn't be home didn't you? " Jennifer looked at her blankly , " I am not sure I know what you are trying to get at" Sara smirked, " You knew I would be at the dress shop today..with Abigail. Didn't you? And you thought it would be a great opportunity for you to be alone with Jack , right?" Jack looked at her , "Jennifer?" She looked at him , " I just thought that it would be nice for the two of us to do something with our son..together." Sara asked if Abby knew that she was coming by to see Jack. " I might have mentioned it to her." Jack looked at Sara and could see she was hurt. The look on her face told him she would explain it..later. Jack turned to Jennifer , " You are better go..you will be late for your meeting. " Jennifer nodded and said goodbye. Sara reminded her about calling from now on, then she was gone. jack apologized again . She looked around and saw what he had done. She was still upset but after everything that had happened the last two weeks with the bombing and Ben , she could not fight with him. He asked about the question about Abby. " I think that's why she suggested we go out for lunch. She wanted to keep me out as long as possible. I actually thought she was trying to become friends." Jack felt terrible , " I will be questioning her about that this evening." Robert came in carrying JJ who had fallen asleep in the cab. After putting him down on his bed, Robert told them about their day and about Santa. " I hope that it was alright to take him" Jack nodded," Not to worry, sounds like a great day." Robert smiled, " Yea ..it was. I even got myself a dinner date tomorrow night with an elf named Katie." Jack and Sara laughed. " Jack is quite the chick magnate." Robert said laughing. Sara frowned at her son, then at Jack. The bell rang and Jack jumped at the chance to answer it. " Hi Daddy." Abby said kissing him hello. " Hello Abigail , you and I need to have a talk."

[fluffysmom]

I really enjoyed the chapters. I felt bad for Sara feeling like Abby deliberately tricked her. I loved Robert making a date with one of Santa's elves.

[blueyed358]

chapters 47-48


Jack followed Abby into the living room. Robert went to get JJ and Sara was in her room changing. " What's wrong Daddy ? " Abby had a nervous tone to her voice. " You knew your Mother was stopping by today? " Abby nodded. " Is that why you asked Sara to lunch..so your Mother and I could be alone? " Abby nodded slowly , " I felt bad for her , she wanted to go with you to take JJ to see Santa. I guess she thought if you spent some family time alone..you know..you might remember what it was like. " Jack looked at his daughter , " First of all..I don't need to remember anything. I remember all of it. Abigail..I would not change the time I had with your mother for anything. They were some of my happiest..and saddest. I am sorry that you are unhappy about us not being together but I am so very happy with my life now..with Sara..I hope that you would come to accept that . I certainly hope this ..trying to push your Mother and I together will stop. I am exactly where I want to be. When Sara saw your Mother here ..she knew then why you asked her to lunch..she was hurt and that hurts me. " Abigail lowered her head , " I am sorry Daddy, I don't know why I did that..I knew it was a bad idea. I didn't mean to hurt Sara..I guess I just wanted to help Mom. I have seen how happy you are ...and I am happy for you , it's just really hard to not see you and Mom together anymore. " Jack took her in his arms and hugged her , " I know..but trust me..it will get easier..I promise. You know it's not disloyal to your mother, to like Sara. Abigail..no more stunts..Ok? " Abby hugged her father , " No more stunts..I promise Daddy and I do like Sara." Now to see about his other girl.



Dean and Angela had arrived and Abby was talking with them and Robert and JJ had joined them. Jack went to get Sara. " Hey..everyone is here..we are waiting for you." Sara had her back to him as she was pulling up her jeans. " Almost ready." she said softly. " Talk to me.." he told her. " So much has been going on these last few weeks. The only reason I didn't lose it when I saw her..with her arms around you was because of everything that went on with Ben. Why can't they just leave us alone. I know I am just stressing over everything ..between them and planning the wedding..I have been thinking..maybe we shouldn't get married." Jack's heart stopped beating, " What ? Wha..What are saying? You have changed your mind..you don't want to marry me ? " Sara shook her head , " I am wondering if we just shouldn't keep things the way they are that's all." Jack took her by the shoulders and sat her on the bed. He knelt in front of her, " Sara..do you want to marry me? " Sara nodded , " It's all I have ever wanted." Jack exhaled , " Are you not ready ?" Sara touched his face, " No..I am ready, but nobody else is..what about you? " Jack took her hand in his, " I don't care if THEY aren't ready. As for myself..I have never been more ready or wanted anything more in my life. So long as you feel the same..I do not wish to wait ..if you want to cancel the big wedding and go to Vegas and get married..then let's do it..right now..tonight..I am that ready." Sara sighed and touched her head to his. " I am not getting married for the first and only time in my life by an Elvis impersonator Jackie. You are right..no cancelling or postponing , let's just get married. I can't wait to be Mrs Jack Deveraux." Jack kissed her, " About that..have you made a decision about the name ..." Sara handed jack her latest article " Read it " jack told her he had already read it , " No Jack..the last paragraph..I added it last night..consider it an early Christmas present."

" On a personal note , to my followers , I would like to tell all of you that this is my final article under the name you see in the byline. On January 8 th I am to marry Jack Deveraux, chief City Editor for the Times. I will no longer be Sara Jamison but will very happily become Sara Deveraux. "



That was all Jack read, he looked up at her smiling, " Are you sure? " Sara laughed, " Yes I am sure , the quality of my writing is staying the same. People will figure it out and if they don't..oh well. Besides..I happen to think that Sara Deveraux is a wonderful name. " Jack beamed at her , " As do I..."



The fire was roaring the music was playing and everyone was talking and decorating the tree. Dean was taking pictures , Robert and Abby were laughing and pushing each other out of the way as the hung ornaments. Abby watched Sara enter the kitchen alone. She took a deep breath and headed in after her. " Sara?" She turned and looked at her , " You need something Abigail ? " Abby shook her head , " I am so sorry about today. I guess I wanted to do something for my Mom..but I didn't want you to get upset either. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. For what it's worth , I had fun today." Sara gave her a small smile, " I had fun too..you know Abby..I think you and I could get along very well..if you would just give it a chance. We both love your father and want him to be happy, I know I can make him as happy as he makes me. " Abby gave her a small smile , " I know you can..you already do. I think we will get along well too. I truly am sorry for hurting your feelings. " Sara looked at Abby and could see she was being sincere, " Let's just forget about that.. ok ? We will start over with a clean slate. " Abby nodded," Thank you, Sara " Jack watched from the doorway as they hugged, his heart filled with love and pride for both of them.



The all sat with the lights closed admiring their fully decorated tree. Jack and Sara sat on the couch , Jack with his arm around Sara , his feet on the coffee table , Dean and Angela sat together on the other end of the couch. Robert sat with JJ on his lap and Abby next to him on the floor. Jack sighed , " it looks wonderful, " then he whispered to Sara , " Are you happy with our tree? " She only smiled and nodded. Dean started laughing . Then Angela and Sara followed. Jack started chuckling also. Robert and Abby looked at each other and JJ said "Why is everyone laughing? " Then Abby asked , " Ok what's so funny?" Dean cleared his throat. Jack said, " Our first Christmas together..we decorated the tree and sat back , just as we are now , I asked Sara if she was happy..just as did now. " Dean cut him off , " Then all hell broke loose." Robert looked at Dean then to his parents , " This I have to hear." Abby agreed , " Yeah..tell us what happened. " Jack sighed, "Fine.. It all started when the four of us decorated our tree.."

The four friends sat around gazing at their tree. All were pleased with the work the had done. Jack wanted everything to be perfect so he lit candles and had brought wine. " Are happy Sara. " She pulled him down kissing him, " Very.." Dean asked Angela, " You smell that?" Angela sniffed, " yeah..it smells like .." Just then the middle of the tree started smoking. Dean and Angela sat , mouths open, then they Dean said , " Ahh..guys..The tree is on fire." jack and Sara stopped kissing and turned to see the beginnings of a fire, " Jack get the extinguisher from the kitchen ! " Sara yelled . Jack was back in a flash and but out the fire quickly....but not quickly enough. The smoke filled the room and the sprinklers went off and the fire alarm sounded . The hall filled with students everyone running around panicking. Angela was yelling to them that everything was under control. Campus police showed up and the fire department as well. The fire department cleared the building and after an hour allowed everyone back in the building. The other residents staring and muttering under their breath at the four of them. Sara and Angela's room smelled of smoke and there was still a lingering cloud in it. The room was freezing as all windows had been left open. Jack apologized repeatedly , " Let me make arrangements for us to sleep elsewhere." About an hour later Jack came back to find the three huddled together , jackets on , huddled under a comforter. Jack told them he checked them in local hotel. " It better be the five star one Jackie or I am going to be really pissed." Angela said. Jack assured them it was in fact the five star and he had gotten them the suites as well. Angela was overjoyed at the room and room service jack had ordered for them. " Gee Jack i may let you burn down our room once a month. " Angela said with a smirk. Jack and Sara left them and went a few doors down to their own room.When Sara came into their room Jack had a Christmas tree there..fully decorated . " Oh Jack.." Jack wrapped his arms around her, " I didn't want you to be without a tree. I am sorry I ruined your night. " She shook her head , " You didn't ruin anything. You are never boring that's for sure.."



Robert and Abby were laughing and Abby said, " You really burnt down their room? " Jack shook his head, " No just a portion of the tree, which I replaced and had the room cleaned besides." Dean and Angela decided to stay downstairs as did Abby as it was very late. JJ had been put to bed and Jack and Sara remained. " Do you remember how the story ends." Sara asked. Jack chuckled and kissed the top of her head. " Of course..."

Jack had walked Sara to the tree after hanging the "Do Not Disturb" sign out. Jack laid her down and they made love on the floor beside the tree. They made love several times and slept on the floor with the lights of the tree glowing all night.

" Thank you for tonight. It was perfect. " Jack tilted her face up to meet his gaze, " Not yet..but if you will follow me it will be." jack lead her to their room and there was a small tree , lights glowing and bathing the room in soft colored lights. " Oh.." was all she could say. "Well the night would not be perfect unless we made love by the light of the tree." Jack laid her down on the bed , " I love you so much Sara." He whispered to her softly. " I love you to Jack..very much."


Jack and Sara laid in each others arms, content after making love. Jack's hand moving mindlessly up and down her arm , Sara's tracing circles on his chest. " Do you have any idea how much I love you? ." she said sleepily. Jack smiled , " No..tell me" Sara chuckled , " Enough to change my name, " That made Jack laugh , " Oh..that is a lot. " Jack kissed her head , " I love you with all my heart..I always have." She sighed and snuggled closer to him , falling asleep , " Goodnight" she whispered. Jack was not ready for sleep yet. He laid there holding her as she slept. How he loved hearing profess her love. It was something they never really did out loud in their past. He thought back to those days , to one day in particular.....


Jack sat on the grass his back against the tree and Sara sat in front of him between his legs, his arms around her. Dean and Angela along side them , Angela sitting upright and Dean laying down , his head on her lap, " Whoa ! I have to get to class , " he jumped up. He kissed Angela goodbye and she told him , " I love you..see you later" Dean stood up lifting his camera bag , " I love you too ..Hey Jack we still playing pool tonight?" Jack nodded , " Yeah..our title is on the line." Dean left and a few minutes later Angela left as well. Jack and Sara remained , " I have to get going in a few minutes too," she said. Jack held her tighter , " Sara..doesn't bother you that we never say ..how we feel to one another..you know like Dean and Angela just did? " Sara sat up and collected her books, " No..why should it? I know how you feel and you know how I feel..the words aren't necessary. They are just a formality ..as long as we show it..well that's what really counts. " Jack watched her closely , she looked uncomfortable. " I don't know..I think it a bit more than a formality . Don't you ever wish to hear the words spoken a loud ? " She leaned forward and kissed him passionately , " Honey..I am fine..really. I will see you tonight? " Jack nodded and she was gone. Was she so different from others that she truly did not want to hear someone tell her they loved her. Jack had lived most of his life without hearing it from the people that he longed to hear those words from. His father was cold and did not believe in it and Angelica would say it but in an off handed way , with little feeling behind it. There had been girls who had said it , but he knew full way it was not real love..not like what he had found with her. He found himself desperate to utter those words to her but fearful to do so. Jack spent his day in the library doing a paper. Then they all went to dinner and to the bar for a pool tournament..which Jack and Dean won. Sara and Jack were in her room on the bed , kissing. Jack looked into her eyes , " Sara..I lo.." She kissed him again. " Why don't you want me to say it? Is there someone else..someone you want to hear those words from? Is that it..you just don't want to hear it from ME ? " Sara sat up , " NO!! Jack there is no one else , don't be an idiot. " Jack sat up now too , " Then what is it..is it that you don't feel the same..you don't wish to say it to me? " Sara shook her head , " You are the only one , you OWN my heart Jack. Don't I show you how I feel ? " Jack nodded , " Yes but.." She exhaled , " Please..just let this go..for a while at least ..ok? " Jack swallowed and nodded. After he had fallen asleep..Sara brushed the hair from his forehead and whispered , " I know it may not count but, I do tell you every night when you are asleep. I love you more then anything else in the whole world . I am sorry I am so afraid to say it while you are awake. " She snuggled down and draped her arm and leg across him. Jack sighed and slowly opened his eyes. He had not been asleep and had heard every word. He waited a long time and then when her breathing slowed he held her tightly , " I am afraid to say it too but..I have to let it out , I love you..with all my heart I love you Sara. " He kissed her head and drifted off to sleep. She was not asleep either , tears formed in her eyes and she sighed . That was how it was for them from that point on , each waiting up until the other said their I love you's to the other, knowing in their hearts that they weren't truly asleep.

Later that night, both Sara and Jack were awaken by yelling. Both jumped out of bed, " Stay here.." he told her. " Like hell I am.." she said as she grabbed to his back and followed him out the bedroom door. JJ's door opened and he stood rubbing his eyes and holding on to Sheldon... his teddy bear. " JJ ..honey go back into bed," Sara whispered, but he came to her with his arms extended . She lifted him up into her arms. Both now behind Jack , there it was again..coming from Roberts room. Jack opened the door..Robert lay in a pool of sweat thrashing around in bed, yelling. " No !..No!..where are they ? ..What did you do with my family?..No you are lying..they were here..my mom..my aunt and uncle...my father..where is my father and my brother..I have a brother and a sister ...if you hurt them..I'll KILL YOU ! ALL OF YOU ! " JJ began to cry , " Sara take him back to his room, " Sara nodded tears in her eyes. Jack knew what was happening to his son. It had happened to him as well , for months after returning home from being held by Tony DiMera. Jack sat on the edge of his bed , " Robert..Robert..wake up" But Robert fought him pushing at him and swinging blindly , hitting Jack in the arm. Jack flinched , then grabbed him by the shoulders. " Robert ! wake up..you are having a nightmare !" Robert's head moved back and forth , trying to wake , " No..no..please..where are they..please..bring them back ! " Jack shook him hard , " Robert ! This is your father ! Open your eyes ..open your eyes and look at me ! " After a few minutes of struggling Robert opened his eyes and looked at his father..his body shaking.. Jack touched his face , " It's all right son..it's all right..you are home. Everyone is here..safe..you are safe." Robert grabbed his father and hugged him. Then he pulled back , " Where is Mom ?..Jack ! Where is Jack ? " Jack held onto his son's shoulder's. " Your Mother is inside with Jack..she is putting him back to sleep. Jack handed him a bottle of water from his night stand. He drank half the bottle then he said , " I am so sorry..I scared him didn't I ? " Jack shook his head, " He is fine..it's you am I concerned about. The nightmares are getting worse? " Robert nodded. " It's seems the happier I am when I am awake..the worse it is at night." Jack kept a hand on his shoulder , to steady him. " We are going to take care of this..of you. Tomorrow I will find you a therapist. I know a bit of what you are going through..so no arguments.." Robert nodded slightly. "Alright..if you think it best." Jack's heart almost broke. His grown son , looking at him like a small child. " Try and get some rest . Shall I stay with you a bit .." he asked . Robert shook his head , " No..thank you..I will be fine now." Jack sighed and left his son sitting up in his bed. Sara was waiting outside , " Jack is asleep..is he alright ? " Jack nodded and she went inside. Neither said a word she grabbed him and held him stroking his hair as he rested his head on her chest. Jack stood in the doorway watching them. His heart broke for their son, he had loved him the second he he knew that he was his father. He still could not believe how accepting Robert was..of him and the past...of his past. The young man so much like his mother..loved him unconditionally..they had not even needed much time. They bonded almost instantly..each desperate to be close to the other. Sara came back out to him and closed the door behind her , then wrapping her arms around Jack, he whispered , " It's going to be alright..we will do whatever is needed for him..I promise you." She nodded and they went back to bed. JJ's door opened slowly , he peeked out and when he saw they had all gone back to bed he walked down the hallway to Robert's room, opening the door slowly. He peeked in and saw his brother laying down staring at the ceiling. "Robbie ? " Robert jumped and turned to see his little brother looking frightened, " Hey buddy..come on in.." JJ stood next to his bed holding Sheldon. " Are you ok ? " he asked in a small voice. " Robert sighed, " Yeah..I am fine..I just had a bad dream. I am sorry if I scared you. " JJ looked at him , " It's ok..I was worried about you. Want to sleep with Sheldon ? He chases my bad dreams away. " Robert smiled,
" No..you need him , but thanks anyway." JJ looked at his bear then looked at his brother , " I have an idea.." The little boy climbed up on the bed and got under the covers , " We can share him..Whenever I had a bad dream Abby would come in and do this..." He pushed Robbie down onto his back and he laid on his side , holding Robbie's hand. " Now close your eyes..Sheldon and I will keep the bad dreams away for you. " Then the little boy stretched up and kissed his brother's head. " There I kissed away all the bad dreams..now go to sleep." JJ fell back to sleep quickly and Robert watched him , tears in his eyes. This small boy meant everything in the world to him . He was so sweet and kind and he looked up to him. Robert knew he would do everything in his power to never let him down. He drifted off to sleep with those little fingers holding tightly to his. Robert slept straight through the rest of the night.. with no more nightmares.

[fluffysmom]

The end was so sweet with JJ coming to check on Robert and offering him his bear. I really like their close relationship.