felineflash
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Toujours dans mon coeur, Maman.
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Being
Feb 25, 2012 22:01:33 GMT -5
Post by felineflash on Feb 25, 2012 22:01:33 GMT -5
Heh...Ironically, I sound like Philip today.
Chapter 101 - Philip the Idiot
Two hours after Brady had left, Philip awoke. He reached for his phone and called Victor. “Dad,” he croaked when his father answered. Yep. My voice is gone. Wonderful.
“Philip, I just spoke to Daniel. I’ll be home tonight,” Victor said before Philip could go on. “Have you lost your voice?” He asked.
“Yeah, I think so. I’ll see you tonight,” Philip whispered, and hung up, glad to spared croaking into the phone any more than he had to. Just as he was putting it back on the nightstand, it rang again. He looked at the screen…Chloe. Damn it. I finally get a chance to talk to her, and…I can’t. What’s next? Am I going to go blind too? He sighed and pushed talk, “Hey Chloe,” he forced out in a harsh whisper, “I’m sorry, I can’t talk right now.”
“Oh. I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “I…well, Brady told me about Kate, and I wanted to see how you’re doing. I’ll let you go, I don’t want to keep you…”
“No, no…” Philip croaked hurriedly. For God’s sake, don’t hang up! “I mean I literally can’t talk. My voice is shot,” he told her, sitting up. “Why don’t you give me an hour and maybe you can come over…I’ll write notes or something,” he chuckled.
“I can’t, I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “I’m leaving town tonight, and I’ve got to pack--”
His heart dropped into the pit of his stomach, and he slumped back against the pillows. Leaving? Leaving? Damn it…no. He started to cough and took the phone away from his ear. He could still hear her chattering excitedly, happily. Leaving and damned happy about it. Way to go, Philip.
Chloe went on, oblivious to the fact that Philip couldn’t hear what she was saying, “We’re doing a presentation for school children in Brookville tonight and tomorrow. It’s just the two nights, but it’s always so much fun doing these shows for the kids. I’ll be back Sunday, if you’d still like to get together,” she said tentatively.
Philip placed the phone to his ear again, still reeling. I want her to be happy. I made her leave so that she would be happy. She’s happy. So, eat it, Philip. You screwed up. “Good luck,” he croaked.
Good luck? What about Sunday? Why’d he suddenly go cold? What did I do this time? “Thank you,” Chloe said cooly. “Are you doing OK?”
“I’m fine. I’ll be fine,” he answered. Say something, idiot. “Chloe…keep in touch, OK?”
Keep in touch? You bastard! I can’t make it today, so that’s it? Argh! “I will. Take care, Philip,” she ended the call without even saying goodbye.
He tossed the phone back onto the nightstand and smacked the bed. What did I think was going to happen? I ran her off. I broke up with her. Did I honestly think that she’d come back? Seriously? Idiot. I’m such a freaking idiot.
He lay there, staring at the ceiling for hours. We had it. We really had it this time, it would have worked, if it wasn’t for me. He couldn’t stop thinking about her. The day in the park, when he’d told her Mom might be sick, the way they’d talked about everything, all the things they’d been through. The tree, the damned tree. Football at Bo’s. Dancing in the rain. Loving in the shower. The way she touched him, the damaged part of him that had never been touched by anyone except doctors or nurses or himself…not even Belle…his body tensed as the shock went through him again, just thinking about it. Like electricity. She had loved him, she’d been willing to love him, and he’d pushed her away. Because he was afraid, because of his mistakes, because he felt as if his world was spinning out of control. And now she was leaving, and perhaps it really was for the best.
He got out of bed and went downstairs and poured himself a drink. Then another, and another, and yet another. He went outside and sat, watching the sun set and getting very, very drunk. Over. It’s over.
“Honestly, you’re not going to get any better if you keep sitting outside in the cold, you know?” Brady startled him.
“I don’t care,” he slurred hoarsely.
“Woah. You definitely lost your voice. Are you hammered?” Brady looked at him.
“Yes. Very. What do you want?” Philip croaked.
Brady turned up his palms and shrugged, “I was just making conversation. I guess I’ll leave you to it. Nicole wanted me to tell you that even though you may not believe it, she is sending prayers Kate’s way.”
At the mention of Nicole, Philip’s head snapped up, “You were with them?”
“Yeah,” Brady said slowly, “Why?”
“Why didn’t you stop her? Why didn’t you…” Philip stopped and slammed the rest of his drink.
“What the hell are you rambling about, bro? How much have you had to drink? Are you even supposed to be drinking with whatever medication you’re on? Philip, man, look at me,” he walked over to Philip and grabbed his face, forcing Philip to look him in the eyes. “Are you hallucinating? Have you blacked out?” He asked worriedly.
Philip shook free, “Let go of me, freak! I’m drunk, I’m not on PCP or something. Jeez!” He exclaimed. He shook his head and asked more calmly, “Why didn’t you tell me Chloe’s leaving Salem?”
“I just found out myself,” Brady replied, eying Philip suspiciously. “She’s going to Brookville, man, not the moon.”
“Brookville?” Philip rasped. “Why Brookville? I thought she’d go back to Europe or something. What the hell’s in Brookville?”
“Europe? For a two day show? Dude, are you sure you should be drinking?”
“Two day show…” Philip repeated slowly. “What do you mean?”
Brady looked at him strangely, then told him, “They’re doing a presentation for kids in Brookville. You know, tonight and tomorrow night? What did she tell you?”
“I don’t know…I wasn’t…listening,” Philip said sheepishly. “I thought she was telling me she was leaving town…for good.”
“You’re an idiot,” Brady snorted.
“Yes. I’m aware of that. Very much aware of that,” Philip agreed, taking off in search of his phone.
Chapter 102 - Friends
He’d tried to call Chloe, but her phone had gone straight to voicemail, and he hadn’t left a message. Leaving a message while drunk, with hardly any voice, just seemed like a bad idea at the time. Then he’d changed his mind and started to call again, but rethought that, fearful that he’d look like he was groveling. He’d then called Nicole, and also gotten voicemail, but left a short message with her that he needed to speak to her. And now he sat in the media room, debating whether he wanted to continue sobering up or resume getting drunk.
The doorbell rang, and Brady, who was nearby, called out, “I’ll get it, Henderson,” he opened the door to find Nicole standing there. “Hi,” he said, surprised.
“I got a strange voicemail. The caller ID said Philip, but I swear it sounded like a sea lion. Where’s Victor?” She greeted him.
“He’s actually on his way back, he’ll probably be here in an hour or so--” Brady started.
Nicole made a face, then shrugged, “Whatever, the hell with him. This is more important. Where’s Philip?”
“Hey,” Philip barked as he poked his head out into the hall. “What are you doing here?”
“You don’t leave messages on people’s phones sounding like a sea lion and then expect them not to wonder what’s up with you, you know. It sounded like you told me you wanted to talk to me,” she slid past Brady and into the media room, plopping herself down on the couch.
“Yeah,” Philip nodded as he followed her in. “I need you to call Chloe.”
Nicole cocked her head and looked at him curiously, “Twilight Zone? Back to junior high? Why not just pass notes in homeroom? Why do you need me to call her?”
“Because, as you put it, I sound like a sea lion,” he pointed out.
“Indeed. What’d you do, anyway? She was pretty pissed when she left.”
“What’d she say?” He asked anxiously.
“That you went cold when she told you she couldn’t get together tonight. She’d suggested Sunday, but you didn’t even mention it. You just shut down. What the hell is wrong with you, Philip? Hey…are you drunk?”
“I was drunk, I’m seriously considering getting drunk again,” he nodded.
“Well, what are you waiting for? Pour me a drink, Dimples!”
As he poured, he told her, “I thought she was leaving Salem for good. I didn’t know what to say, she sounded happy, and I…just…yeah.”
“Philip, do me a favor. This is like having a conversation with Harvey Fierstein. Whisper, please,” she smiled as he handed her a drink. “Thanks.”
He grinned and began again in a whisper, “So I thought she was telling me she was leaving town.”
“In what language does ‘two-night engagement in Brookville’ translate to ‘leaving Salem forever and ever’?”
He shrugged, “I didn’t hear her. I took the phone away because I was coughing,” he explained.
“So…why didn’t you ask her to repeat herself?” Nicole prodded.
“I didn’t want to hear it again?” He offered.
“You hadn’t heard it in the first place! Who are you? What have you done with the real Philip Kiriakis, the one who has a brain?” She asked, frustrated.
“I know, I know. That’s why I need you to call her. I tried, but it went straight to voicemail.”
“Because she’s performing, dummy. Seriously, Philip, did you hit your head in that fire? Pour me another, please. I haven’t had a drink in months.”
"I know she’s performing now. I just wanted to ask you to explain it for me, and I’ll call her when I can. You didn’t have to come out here, you know,” he told her as he poured more drinks.
“I was bored. And besides, you need a drinking buddy, and it sure as hell isn’t going to be Brady. And seriously, you sounded so bad on the phone, I could barely make out what you were saying,” she accepted the drink, sat back and looked at him. The medicinal whiskey, or scotch, or whatever he was drinking was not doing him any favors. He looked worse than he had the day before, if that was possible. “This bronchitis is really kicking your butt, huh?”
“Yeah,” he sighed. “And stress. My mom, Chloe, work…I was about to close a big deal before I got sick, and now it’s up in the air…” He ran his hand over his cheek, rubbing the stubble. “I just haven’t seen a reason to shave when I’m just rolling around here all day feeling like crap.”
“Honey, you’re in need of more than just a shave. You need, like, a week of sleep.”
“Can’t. You look great,” he changed the subject.
“Thank you. I don’t feel so great, but it’s the looks that count, right? You know, Philip, Kate’s hardly my favorite person, and the feeling is entirely mutual, but…I am praying for her. If anyone can beat this, she can. She is the strongest woman I know,” Nicole said sincerely.
“Thanks. I hope you’re right. I can’t lie, it’s got me scared to death, you know?” He stared into his glass for a moment, then looked back up at her.
She nodded, “I know,” she shook her head, smiling, “you always were such a sweet kid. And you grew up into a pretty decent guy.”
“I wouldn’t go that far,” he grimaced.
“Aw, shut up. You’re a decent guy, and you know it. You’d have to be, to put up with the likes of me after everything I’ve done…”
“I’m no angel either,” he pointed out.
“You know what? I’m kinda drunk,” Nicole giggled. “I bet Chloe’s done by now, let’s call her.”
“You do the talking,” he told her.
“Don’t worry, honey, I will,” she laughed, taking out her phone. She dialed and waited. “Voicemail,” she told him. “Hey, Chloe, it’s me. I’m here with Philip. We’re getting a little tipsy. He’s waving at ya. Anyway, calling to check up on you, hon, and see how the show went. Philip is sorry for being an ass. See you soon!” She clicked off and stuffed her phone back in her purse.
“Gee, thanks,” he grumbled.
“Well, what did you expect me to say? I wonder if she’ll call back. Hey, did you get her a Christmas present yet?” Nicole held out her glass for another refill.
“Yeah,” he answered with a grin.
“Well, what is it?” She prodded.
“I’m not telling you. Besides, I don’t even know if she’ll even accept it, at this point.”
Nicole rolled her eyes, “She’ll accept it. Now what is it?”
“I’m not telling,” he shook his head firmly, thinking of the gift tucked safely away in his office. Perfect…if she forgave him. Well, hopefully perfect.
“You don’t trust me?” Nicole pouted.
“No!” He answered with a laugh. “Sorry, old habits die hard. I might consider you a friend, but I sure as hell don’t trust you.”
Nicole huffed and threw a cushion at him, which he caught and tossed back to her. “You know what, though?” She asked pensively, “I learned something from all of…this. That I can have friends. That I can be a good person. Or a fairly good person. I’ve spent so long just thinking that I couldn’t have any of those things, and I became…a shell, a caricature. I honestly don’t know what I’d do without Chloe, or Brady…or you. Thanks for being my friend, Philip.”
He smiled and winked at her, “Thanks for being mine.” The front door opened and closed, and they heard Henderson greet Victor out in the hall.
“Oh, oh,” Nicole frowned. “There’s someone who’s definitely not my friend, and I have a feeling he’s not going to be too thrilled to discover that you are.”
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