Stealing Home (Read 10,087 times)

[gapeach]

LOVE seeing Brady and how Chloe knows Phillip is still jealous about Brady! Chloe and Brady were good friends even after their divorce but her heart BELONGS to Phillip!!

[melly]

"Maggie spends most of her time worrying about Daniel and Jennifer..." Too true!

And yes, Chloe....Philip is still jealous, whether he admits it or not.

LOL--Morgan/Megan!

[fluffysmom]

Philip is so jealous. Every word and gesture had him suspicious of Brady.

[unavitasegreta]

I loved jealous Phillip! I think Chloe needed to see that to give her some confidence about her relationship with Phillip.

[Kpatch]

Chapter 13


As soon as Brady left, Philip headed to his home office, saying, “I need to check my emails. I’m expecting a message from work.”

Chloe followed him. “Philip wait,” she said. “You’re still jealous of Brady, aren’t you?”

Philip looked at Chloe for a minute before answering. Then he shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. “Not jealous, just a little competitive is all. We always have been.” He sat in the chair behind his desk and reached for the phone.

“Because of me,” she said.

“Because of a lot of things,” he retorted. He really didn’t want to have this conversation right now.

“But mostly me,” Chloe said, not letting the subject drop. “Philip, you don’t need to be jealous of Brady anymore.”

Philip’s brow knit. He knew he probably shouldn’t go there, but she opened the door, so he walked in. Abandoning his plans to make a phone call, he asked her, “Are you sure? Because you don’t remember divorcing him.”

“Oh I see. You think since I don’t remember the divorce, that I still have feelings for him. Well, I kind of do. I mean I do remember some things that happened in Vienna. More like bits and pieces.”

“You do? You didn’t tell me. Hmmm.” He squinted at her. “Seems like there are a lot of things you’re not telling me lately.”

“I know,” she said. “It’s not my intention to keep secrets from you. The things that happened between me and Brady in Vienna, well, it’s just not something I really want to talk about. But Philip, what I’m telling you is I don’t love Brady anymore. I love you. You believe me, don’t you?”

“Yes, Chloe, I do believe you.” Still, there was something in his gut that bothered him. “But seeing you two together, well ... he was your first love and ….”

“No, Philip, he was my first husband. You were my first love.”

“Yeah well, it didn’t feel that way to me. The outcome was the same. You chose him. And, jeez, I know I sound like a petulant child and I’m sorry, but some things you never get over.” Being around Brady and Chloe in the same room just naturally made his blood pressure rise.

“I see. So ... you are still jealous, even now.”

He sighed heavily. “Damn it, Chloe, I was 18 and you’d been my whole world for three years. That’s a lifetime to a teenager. I never felt that way about anyone before, or, quite honestly, since then. You obviously didn’t feel as much for me as I did for you. Right or wrong, that’s the way it was, and yes, you broke my heart. It wrecked me.” He saw her wince. “Look, I’m not trying to make you feel guilty. I mean it’s ancient history now, but ... it’s hard to recover from something like that.”

“I never meant to hurt you so much. I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “For what it’s worth, I’m truly sorry.”

“I know you are,” Philip said. “I know it. I mean, I’m a grown man, right? A lot has happened since then, but like I said, some things you never forget.”

“Except if you have amnesia,” she said, trying to lighten the mood.

“Sorry,” he said. “That was a pretty thoughtless thing for me to say.”

“It’s okay Philip,” she reassured him. “My memory will come back. I’m remembering more and more every day, and as memories come back to me, it’s hard not to be a little introspective, you know?”

“About what?”

“About everything. It bothers me that I’ve been so disloyal to people I say I care about.”

“Like who?”

“Like you for starters, like you just said, I broke your heart. And they tell me I cheated on a couple of my husbands,” she said sadly. “I never thought I’d be the type of woman who would cheat on her husband. That isn’t how I see myself.” She shrugged. “Who knows,” she said with tears in her eyes. “Maybe it was the universe’s way of saying we were never really right for each other, because if we were, I wouldn’t have cheated.” Chloe paused to read Philip’s expression. “I know what you’re thinking. That’s too convenient an excuse, right? And there is no excuse for what I did. Lucas and Daniel didn’t deserve to be treated that way. I mean, I assume I loved them. I don’t remember much about either of them, just bits and pieces, but based on what I know, they were good to me. They took care of me. I guess I saw them as stand-ins for that father figure I was always looking for when I was an orphan.”

Philip knew that there was more to her marriages than that, but he refrained from saying anything. Chloe was trying to sort out her past and find a way to cope with experiences she didn’t fully remember.

“Philip, I have no intention of ever hurting you again, but I can understand why you think I would. I mean, if I cheated on men I was supposed to love forever, why wouldn’t you be afraid I’d cheat on you too?”

Philip was stunned by Chloe’s remark. He worried about a lot of things, but surprisingly, that wasn’t one of them. “I’m not worried about that, Chloe.”

“Really?” Chloe looked confused. “Because the way you act around Brady....”

Philip shook his head vehemently. “No. You’re wrong. I don’t worry that you’ll cheat on me, Chloe. That thought doesn’t even cross my mind. What I worry about is that you’ll leave me for another man.”

[gapeach]

So glad that Phillip told Chloe what he was afraid of. Sure am loving this story Kpatch!!

[melly]

Good to see Philip allowing himself to be vulnerable here...both because of Brady and concern that Chloe will leave him.

[unavitasegreta]

I love the honesty! You have the best cliffhangers!!! Can't wait for tomorrow.

[fluffysmom]

I like Philip's honesty. I wonder how Chloe will react to his fear.

[Kpatch]

Chapter 14a


“I don’t worry that you’ll cheat on me, Chloe,” Philip said. “That thought doesn’t even cross my mind. What I worry about is that you’ll leave me for another man.”

“Philip, no.”

“Philip, yes,” he said, a little facetiously. “Come on Chloe, you know my life story. I’ve been Plan B for almost every woman I ever loved. I’m kind of used to being second choice, the guy that gets dumped for the other guy. It’s become a pattern. But ... if it happens again -- if it happened with you -- I’d be done. I know that because last time we were apart, it nearly did me in.”

This was the first Chloe had heard Philip talk that way about their separation. “I didn’t know that. I mean, I know we broke up, but it wasn’t because I cheated on you.” Or was it? Chloe felt the panic start to rise. “Oh god, please tell me it wasn’t because I cheated on you.”

“No no. Nothing like that,” he added quickly. “Like I said, it’s not so much I’ve gotten cheated on, at least not that I know of.” Philip was quiet for a minute. “More often, I just get cast aside.”

Looking at his sad face, Chloe hurt for Philip, knowing that she was the one who started the pattern.

“I just don’t want to go through anything like that again,” he continued. “I know you think co-dependence is a bad thing, but I don’t. My life is completely intertwined with yours and that’s how I want it to stay.”

Chloe breathed a sigh of relief. “Me too. And it will, Philip. I mean, we’re equals. You’re not an authority figure and you’re not a father figure. I relate to you completely differently than I did to anyone else.”

“Um. I’m not sure I follow,” Philip stuttered.

“Oh. Well, Brady and Lucas and Daniel were all a little older so I imagine I must have related to them on a different level, more like a father figure. Remember I said I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching? I’ve also been doing some online research and trying to psychoanalyze myself.”

Philip chuckled. “Don’t tell me. It all goes back to your childhood, right?”

“Please don’t laugh at me, Philip. It does. It goes back to my parents and my abandonment issues,” she said. “There’s a lot of information on the Internet about orphaned children,” she explained. “I know Nancy had her reasons for giving me up, but ... in reality, she sentenced me to a hellish childhood, letting me go through what I went through in orphanages and foster homes, like she never cared about me. For years, I felt like no one really cared about me, not my mother, not my father -- your parents are supposed to love you unconditionally, but mine didn’t. I never even got adopted,” she sniffled, “because I wasn’t worth loving.”

“Chloe, that’s not true.” Philip said soothingly.

“Yes it was. That’s not an opinion, Philip, it’s a fact.” Chloe finally sat down in the chair at the other side of the desk. “I always figured something was wrong with me that made me unlovable. But I never wanted anyone to know that about me, so as I grew up, I learned to protect myself by not getting overly attached to people, and not letting them get to know me.”

“That’s what you were like when I first met you,” Philip recalled.

“It was,” she nodded. “I tried to keep you at arms’ length, remember?” Then a smile formed on her lips. “But you were really persistent. And sincere. We became this inseparable unit. Philip and Chloe, Chloe and Philip. Sometimes I didn’t know where we ended and I began. You were the first person I let myself get attached to, and to be honest, it scared me to death.”

“So are you saying that’s a bad thing?” Philip appeared to be skeptical. “Because it felt right to me.”

“No, not necessarily a bad thing,” she said as gently as she could. “It just wasn’t right for me, at least not back then. See, when I got to know Brady, I don’t know, he made me feel independent for the first time in my life, like I was capable of standing on my own two feet and I guess that kind of support was what I needed at the time. He helped me figure out who I wanted to be.”

She felt Philip’s eyes on her as she continued to look down, but he didn’t say a word. She hoped he didn’t hate her for the things she was saying, especially knowing that Brady was Philip’s Achilles heel.

[gapeach]

SO glad they are finally having an honest conversation about their feelings.

[melly]

Awww.... Sad that it took Kate causing Chloe so much pain before these two opened up to each other.

[unavitasegreta]

Another fabulous chapter. I'm glad they are having this needed discussion!

[fluffysmom]

I love the honesty. I hope this conversation will help both of them to put their doubts and fears behind them.

[Kpatch]

Chapter 14b


She looked up again and spoke directly to Philip. “Philip, I was so attached to you in high school, that it scared me to death. You needed me to need you, and I needed to not need you. I was so sure you’d abandon me eventually, like everyone else did, so I figured if I was the one who walked away first, it would hurt less. Am I making sense? I expected you to hurt me, and in order to protect myself, I had to be the one to leave first, if that makes sense.”

“Like a pre-emptive strike,” Philip observed, using military terminology.

“Yes! That’s it exactly,” Chloe took a breath, relieved that Philip seemed to get what she was saying. “I had this need to be in control of the situation because I felt like I never had control of anything in my whole life. The only thing I thought I could control was my emotions. With Brady and the others, I was less emotional for some reason. My judgment was less clouded, so it didn’t feel as scary, you know?” She swiped at her tears, and started to talk faster and faster. “And even though it really bothered me to see you so hurt, I had to be stoic, I had to stay resolute. So I steeled myself, I purposely never admitted to you how much I felt for you, because that would have been giving up control, giving it to someone else. I had to keep up my walls because if I didn’t ... if I didn’t, and if you ended up hurting me, leaving me, I was sure I’d blow away in the wind like a dandelion. I’m sure this all sounds crazy to you. It kind of does to me too, but emotions don’t always make sense.” After pausing a few moments, she said, “You’re being awfully quiet. Please say something, Philip.”

Philip looked lost in thought. She knew that look. It’s how he looked when he felt guilty about something. Finally, he nodded. “You’re right, emotions don’t always make sense. But sometimes they make perfect sense, like the way I felt about you since the very first time I looked into your eyes.” Philip swallowed the lump in his throat. Maybe it wasn’t guilt, maybe he was just emotional, moved by Chloe’s explanation. “Chloe, I need you to know I would have never abandoned you back then. Never. And I want you to have faith that I never will.”

Chloe believed Philip. She believed him with all her heart. He never let her down, he never hurt her and she was certain that he never would. “That goes both ways, Philip. I’m not gonna leave you for another man, so please don’t worry.”

“Okay good. I’m counting on that,” he smiled. “I don’t care what anyone else says.”

Chloe tilted her head. “What anyone else says? What does that mean?”

“Oh.” Philip looked like he was sorry he said that. “Um. Well. More than a few people have told me I must be out of my mind to give you another chance to break my heart again.”

Chloe winced. “That’s so rude.”

“What can I say,” Philip shrugged. “You have some pretty vocal detractors.”

“I know,” she said. “And I doubt anything I do could turn them into fans.” Chloe wondered why Philip brought that up. “So ... then, why are you? Why are you giving me another chance?”

“Because ... because I don’t care what people say,” Philip smiled, his demeanor softening. “I love you. You say you won’t break my heart, but I know there are no guarantees. And you know? I don’t care. I love you enough to chance it.”

“That’s not what you said a minute ago when you said you were afraid I’d leave you for someone else.”

Waving at the air, he said. “Forget that. It was just a childish reaction to Brady’s visit. Come here.” He held out his hand and Chloe got up from her chair, took his hand and sat on his lap. Looking into her eyes, he said, “Given a choice, I’d always take the chance to be with you, Chloe. You’re worth it to me. You’re worth the risk.”

Even after everything she just told Philip, he proved he’d still be there for her, just like always. Whatever made her think that Philip wasn’t the right man for her once upon time was obviously all wrong. She thanked God they had this second chance. Tears rolled down Chloe’s cheeks, and all she could manage to say was, “Thank you,” before kissing Philip’s lips.