Collateral Damage (Read 56,419 times)

[fluffysmom]

I can hardly wait to find out the plan.

[jwsel]

Chapter 534

Shane set the phone down and looked across the desk at Kim. She stared back at him anxiously.

"What did he say?" she asked.

Realizing that his end of the telephone conversation had mostly been little more than "I see,""Right," and "Call me as soon as you know," Shane filled Kim on his conversation with Mickey Horton.

"Mickey hasn't heard from the Louis Pasqua yet," Shane said. "He's the U.S. Attorney," he added, then realized from Kim's scowl that she already knew that. "Sorry, of course you know who Pasqua is. Anyway, Mickey knows what Tarrington offered, so he'll push for that deal." He hesitated. "I don't know when we'll know anything for sure, but Mickey said he'd call back as soon as he talks to Pasqua."

Kim said nothing, but he could see in her eyes her still-simmering anger and her growing pain. He tried to think of something comforting to say, but nothing came to mind.

"I know you're decided," Kim said. "And you know I support you, Shane. . . ."

"But? I know there's a 'but' coming." He said the words in a way that told her he meant it as a joke, but neither of them laughed.

Kim stood up from her chair and walked around the desk. Shane watched her slow movements, noting how she briefly hesitated when she looked up at the mantle behind his desk and the row of family photographs there. With a sad smile, Kim surveyed the pictures before lowering her eyes toward Shane. "But are you absolutely sure there's nothing else you can do?"

He reached out and put a hand on her shoulder, then pulled her toward him. Kim pressed her head against his chest and wrapped her arms around him. Shane held her tightly as he racked his brain, trying to find any other option.

"The only options are to ask the soldiers to testify or claim the ISA is lying about what happened with Lawrence," he explained. "Those soldiers saved my life; I can't ask them to risk jail by coming forward."

"Then what about using Jack and the press?" Kim asked.

Shane sighed. "You heard Tarrington. . . . The ISA could lock John, Steve and Roman away. They could destroy Carly's career."

"They'd all risk that for you," Kim said. "They wouldn't let Tarrington's threats stop them if you asked."

She was right.

"I know. . . ." Shane knew he had already explained, but he said it again. "But that's also why I can't ask. I can't let them ruin their lives on some wild gamble that might not even work. . . . I know it's not fair, but this is the best option."

As he held her, Shane felt his anger rising. He silently cursed Tarrington and the ISA, and then, for good measure, Fate, for bringing him and Kim back together, only to tear them apart again.

He reminded himself that it was just two years. After that, they would be together with their children. He tried to tell himself that two years sounded a lot longer than it was. He had been on missions nearly as long as that.

A knock on the door caused Kim to pull away. She looked at him, while Shane called out for whoever was knocking to come in. An instant later, the office door opened and Eve rushed in.

"I raced back from Chicago as soon as I heard," she said, her words running together. "Is it true about Andrew's school? Is everyone really okay."

Kim assured her that Andrew was fine and playing in the garden. Eve let out a relieved breath. "Thank God," she said. "I was so worried. They're not saying much on the news, except that the ISA stopped a terrorist attack."

With a snort, Kim stepped away from Shane. She didn't say anything, but just shook her head in disbelief. Eve frowned slightly and gave Shane a questioning look.

"Don't worry about it, sweetheart," he told Eve. He did not want to try to explain what had happened with Lawrence or explain to Eve about what had followed with Tarrington. What was important was to discuss the future with her. Shane looked at Kim, who gave him a slight nod. Taking a deep breath, Shane said, "There's something we need to discuss with you and Andrew."

Eve's frown deepened. In a low voice, she said, "I don't like the sound of that."

"Believe me, neither do we," Kim muttered. She glanced at Shane. "Maybe you should tell Eve now, before we tell Andrew."

Shane was not sure how Eve would take it, so he decided to anticipate the worse. He braced himself for the explosion as he said, "The Government made a new offer . . . and . . ."

"And?" Eve's eyes narrowed.

"And I've decided to take it," Shane said. He decided against explaining the circumstances of the offer, but he told her the basics.

Eve scowled. "Do you believe them? I mean, do you believe they'll keep their promise?"

Shane was surprised by the question. He had not questioned the legitimacy of the offer despite Tarrington's prior manipulations, but he doubted the U.S. Attorney would go along with a lie. He saw that Kim was watching him with interest; obviously she wanted to know if he believed Tarrington.

"I think it's legitimate," Shane said. "But I'll make sure Mickey dots every 'i' and crosses every 't' to make sure." He was surprised that Eve was handling the news so calmly. "It's going to be very hard on your brother, so I'm really hoping you'll stay in Salem and be here for him--"

"And for Kim and Jeannie, too," Eve said. She looked at Kim. "I know we've had our problems in the past, Kimberly, but you know I'll do whatever I can to help while Dad's gone."

Kim smiled appreciatively as she walked around the desk. She held out her arms and gave Eve a hug. "Thank you, Evie."

Shane had to smile a little as he watched Kim and Eve. It had taken them a long time to overcome their conflicts, but seeing them together, he believed they would be able to provide support for one another in the coming months.

Still with an arm around Kim, Eve turned in Shane's direction. "I guess you haven't told Andrew yet?"

Shane felt his smile falter. No, they had not talked to Andrew. Would he understand? They had talked with him about the possibility of Shane going to prison, but would the reality of it actually happening cause Andrew to get angry again? Would he accuse Shane of lying once more?

With a sigh, Shane said, "I guess we'd better get on with that."

Eve volunteered to get Andrew and meet them in the library. As she disappeared, Kim studied Shane for a moment.

"He's a child and it will be hard for him to understand, but he loves you, Shane," she said. It was like she could read his mind. "No matter what he says, you need to remember that."

Shane nodded as she held out a hand. Together, they slowly walked together to the library, where they were met by Andrew and Eve, who was carrying Jeannie. Once inside, Eve set the toddler down on the ground. While Andrew took a seat on the couch, Jeannie toddled over to where her favorite stuffed bunny was lying. She picked up the pink toy, carried it over to Shane, and held it up for him.

"Thank you, sweetheart," Shane said, trying to keep his voice from breaking. He took the toy from his daughter, while Kim lifted Jeannie up and took a seat on the couch next to Andrew.

With Jeannie on her lap and an arm around Andrew, Kim said, "Your father has something important he needs to tell you."

God, this is bloody hard, Shane thought as he saw Andrew frown almost exactly like Eve had earlier. Before Shane could figure out the right words, the boy asked, "Are you going away, Daddy?"

Shane and Kim exchanged a quick look as he tried to recover from the surprise. But with Andrew broaching the subject, it suddenly seemed easier to speak.

Shane crouched down so he was directly in front of Andrew. "Do you remember when Mommy and Aunt Kayla were gone and I explained that I would be going away for awhile?"

"And then we would go to England?" Andrew asked.

"That's right," Kim said. "Daddy's going to go away and when he comes back, we're all going to move to England."

Andrew seemed to think for a moment. It was a surprise, but he seemed to be taking it well.

Shane took advantage of the silence to say, "This may be hard for you to understand, Sport, but one of the things I have to do is say that I'm guilty of committing some crimes. You know how some of the kids at school said I'm a traitor. . . . Well, when I plead guilty, I'll be agreeing with them."

"But you're not a traitor," Andrew said, his voice insistent. "Uncle Steve said you're a hero because you rescued him."

Shane glanced at Kim, who had a mournful expression on her face. "I know what Uncle Steve said. . . ." Shane tried to figure out how to explain. "But it's like I told you . . . when I decided to rescue Uncle Steve, I knew there might be some people who thought I was doing a bad thing. Now I need to accept that, and it means that a lot more people will say I'm a traitor."

"It doesn't matter," Eve said from where she was standing. "Let them say what they want. We know the truth, don't we?" After a pause, she added, "We know Daddy did the right thing in helping Uncle Steve, don't we, Andrew?"

Andrew finally nodded. Then he looked back at Shane. "Will you be here for Christmas, Daddy?"

Shane sighed and shook his head. "I don't think so, Sport. I don't know when exactly I'll be going, but it will probably be before Christmas."

Seeing the disappointment on Andrew's face, Shane felt his chest tighten. Would there ever come a time when he didn't let his children down?

"Andrew, honey. . . ." Kim squeezed the arm that she had wrapped around Andrew's shoulders. "I know you'd like Daddy to be here for Christmas, but this means that when he gets home, it'll be right before Christmas. So we'll be able to have a really big Christmas when Daddy comes back."

"Yeah, Sport. . . ." Shane reached out and ruffled a little of Andrew's hair. "It won't be that long. Before you know it, we'll be back in England at Donovan Manor."

"And I'm not going anywhere," Kim said softly.

Shane smiled softly. "That's right. Mommy's going to be right here."

He looked into Kim's moist eyes. She swallowed tightly as their eyes met then reached out her hand and brushed the side of his cheek. She forced a small smile to her face and nodded. "I'll be right here."

Shane took her hand in his and kissed it. He had no doubts, but he was awed by the love and the devotion in her eyes. He tried to speak, but couldn't. He finally managed to mouth the words, "Thank you."

An instant later, the telephone rang. Not wanting to pull away from Kim, Shane let Eve answer. After a moment, she lowered it and nervously said, "It's Mickey Horton."

Shane found it hard to pull his eyes away from Kim's, but he forced himself to stand and take the phone from Eve. He listened as Mickey reported on his call with Lewis Pasqua and their agreement.

"Shane?" Mickey asked. "Do you understand?"

From where he stood, Shane glanced first at Eve, who was staring up at him expectantly. Turning, he looked to the couch. Kim and Andrew were both watching him with similar anxious expressions. In Kim's lap, Jeannie seemed oblivious to the tension that everyone else was feeling. She was gazing intently at the cameo broach pinned to Kim's blouse and reached out her little fingers to the carved face, giggling as she brushed the stone.

He tried to remind himself again that two years wasn't much longer than some ISA missions, but that did not stop the agony of the thought of being apart from his family.

"Shane?" Mickey repeated.

Shane forced himself to take a deep, steadying breath before responding. "Yes, Mickey, I understand." He spoke more for Kim's benefit than for his own. "We'll meet you tomorrow, sign the documents, and then go to the court. And they'll take me into custody immediately afterward."

Kim let out a small gasp. Her mouth fell open and her eyes widened. "Tomorrow," she said, her voice little more than a soft breath.

Tomorrow. Shane looked again at his children and then at Kim. Tonight would be their last night together for the next two years.

[gapeach]

Dang I should have read this before putting on my make up. I am still praying for a miracle to happen so Shane doesn't have to go away.

[MrsM]

Wah!!!!

[fluffysmom]

It's heartbreaking. Come on Steve, John, Bo and Roman...come up with a plan.

[jwsel]

Chapter 535

"You sure about this?" Kayla asked. Her arms were wrapped around Steve's waist and his good arm was resting across her shoulders. She had tried to get him to rest, but he was too amped up even to sit.

Steve studied the living room. Perched on the edge of her chair, Carly was explaining the toxin to Jennifer and Jack, who were sitting on a couch, comparing notes, and making suggestions about her statement.

"I'm sure," Steve said.

They had gathered at Tom and Alice Horton's house. That had been Steve's idea. He suspected the ISA would be watching each of their homes, so he suggested they secretly gather at the Hortons'. It was easy enough to justify Jennifer and Jack spending time at her grandparents, and Bo and Carly were effectively family. Steve and Kayla had gone to Roman's and Marlena's from the hospital and had then snuck around the back to the door to the Horton kitchen. Currently, Marlena was home alone, pretending that Steve and Kayla were dozing in a guest room, while she waited for Roman to come back from working the refinery crime scene.

Now if only Roman, John, and Bo would just get back here unnoticed. Actually, Steve had few doubts about Roman. It was John and Bo that had the tougher task.

"You don't think they ran into trouble?" Kayla asked. "If the ISA suspects. . . ."

Steve shook his head. "We've got to assume the ISA suspects something, but we can't worry. Your brothers can take care of themselves."

Alice Horton came through the kitchen door carrying a tray of doughnuts. "I figured all this secret planning might have made you hungry." She stopped in front of Steve and he lifted his arm off of Kayla and picked up a doughnut. They were still warm.

"Thanks, Mrs. H," he said.

Kayla smiled and passed on a doughnut. "I'll take a bite of his," she said.

"Not on your life, baby," Steve teased. "I know marriage is all about sharing, but a man's got to draw a line somewhere." He raised the doughnut. "And this is--"

Kayla's head darted forward. She chomped down on the doughnut.

"Hey!"

She pulled away, leaving Steve with about two thirds of the original pastry. He looked at it in disbelief, then raised his head to his wife. Kayla took a nibble from the remnants of her stolen piece and gave him a coy smile. "I'm sorry. Were you saying something?" She ignored Steve's mock snarl, turned to Alice, and smiled softly. "It's delicious. . . . Just you didn't have to. We're already burdening you and Doctor Horton--"

"Hush," Alice said. "If you can do something to fix this travesty then Tom and I'll do whatever we can. The doughnuts are nothing." She paused, then added, "Speaking of Tom. He was watching out the kitchen window and said something about Roman's car pulling up."

Steve jerked forward, even as Kayla seemed to try to hold him still. "Steve!"

But he was too anxious. Roman's part was critical. Without him, Steve's plan would fail. Steve was almost to the kitchen door when it opened and Roman and Tom Horton entered the living room.

"Did you get it?" Steve asked.

Roman stopped and then broke into a grin as he pulled the videotape out of his pocket. "They didn't even realize it was there. Ol' Tarrington doesn't have a clue we've got it."

Steve felt a wave of relief. "Great," he said. Glancing at Kayla, he gave her his best reassuring smile. "See, baby, everything's going exactly according to plan. Now that we've got big brother on our side, nothing can stop us."

Still carrying the tape, Roman headed for the television. For the first time, Steve realized that Roman also was carrying a video camera.

"I grabbed this from the house," Roman said. He began hooking up the camera to the TV.

Carly, Jack, and Jennifer all sat up and watched him. Kayla put an arm around Steve as she too watched her brother. When Roman finished setting everything up, he glanced over his shoulder.

"I already rewinded it, so it's ready to go." He pressed play as he added, "Let's see what we've got."

Steve watched he snowy image on the screen switch to the room beneath the refinery. From the camera's fixed point, he could see the gas chamber and, next to it, the area where he had faced off with Lawrence. At the moment, though, the room was empty.

"Hmm. . . . Must have rewound too far," Roman said. "Let me fast-forward it." He punched a button and watched the screen at high-speed until some figures finally entered the screen. He punched the button again and it switched back to normal speed. They could see that Lawrence and some of his men had placed Shane inside the gas chamber. Lawrence was now taunting Shane.

Steve turned away as they exchanged words. He did not have to watch the video; he had been there. Instead, he left Kayla with the others watching the recording and walked toward the kitchen.

Where are John and Bo? Steve asked himself. He hoped they had not run into trouble with the ISA, but he told himself that the ISA had no reason to do anything to John and Bo right now. Shane had given Tarrington what he wanted and that smug SOB probably figured he was in total control now. Steve was looking forward to proving otherwise.

He was still standing there when he felt a hand touch his shoulder. Jerking his head around, he saw Alice Horton immediately behind him.

"Would you give me a hand in the kitchen, Steven?" she asked.

Steve glanced toward the TV and saw that everyone else was still watching the screen with rapt attention. On the screen, Lawrence was revealing his plan for the school and giving Steve his "choice" of button to push.

Alice tugged Steve's hand. "Come into the kitchen."

Steve shrugged and followed Alice out of the room into the kitchen. "I doubt you really need my help with more donuts, Mrs. Horton, and with my arm in this sling, I can't do much cleaning."

"Phooey," Alice snapped. "I just figured you didn't need to see all that again."

Steve shook his head. "I'm a big boy, Mrs. Horton."

With a sigh, Alice nodded. "I know you are. . . . But you saw something today that I don't think a lot of men ever see."

"And what's that?"

Alice looked him over carefully. "Pure evil, Steven. I used to think there wasn't such a thing. I used to think there was good in every man, but the last ten years . . . I've seen a lot of evil things. Jake Kositchek, the DiMeras, . . . and Lawrence Alamain. That man was evil."

"Well he's gone now," Steve pointed out. "Score one for the good guys."

Alice nodded. "True, but you saw that evil firsthand today and sometimes I worry that if we see evil like that too much, it won't seem so evil any more."

"So we don't get so comfortable with it?" Steve said.

"Something like that," Alice replied. "Better to focus on the good and--"

Her words were cut off by the living room door bursting open. Steve spun around and saw Kayla in the doorway. Her eyes were dark and she stared at him without saying a word.

"Sweetness, what is it?"

Kayla's lip quivered and she swallowed a few times. She shook her head abruptly. "I can't." Then she rushed to the back door, jerked it open, and ran outside.

Completely bewildered, Steve looked through the door into the living room. The video was still playing and nobody had seemed to notice Kayla had rushed out. Steve looked at Alice, who looked back at him with a confused expression that probably mirrored the look on his own face.

Recovering slightly, Steve bolted through the still-open door. He ran into the darkness, ignoring the cold December air.

"Kayla," he called out before he spotted her standing next to a hedge that ran along the back border of the Horton's backyard. Slowing down, he approached her and repeated, "Kayla?"

She was breathing hard, but as he watched her, she steadied her breaths. "I . . . I'll be okay," she finally said.

"What happened?" Steve asked.

Kayla turned suddenly, "What happened? What happened is that I just watched my husband. . . my husband, the father of my daughter and our unborn child -- I just watched him open a door and expose himself to a lethal toxin."

Damn. Steve had not had a chance to tell Kayla about the details of what happened in Lawrence's hideout earlier. He tried to think of something to say. "You knew I was exposed to the toxin."

"Exposed, yes," Kayla shot back. "I didn't know you dragged Lawrence to the gas chamber, opened the door, and stepped inside."

"Kay--"

"No." She cut him off. After taking another long breath, she said in a more controlled voice, "I'm not going to yell at you or be angry. I know who you are, Steve, and I know I can't change that. . . ." She turned away from him and looked up at the stars, which were just becoming visible overhead. "I know you didn't have any other options and Shane would have died if you didn't do it. . . . But I can't help how I feel, and it terrifies me. I'm terrified that you're going to go off one day and do something ridiculously heroic and I'm going to be have to sit in St. Luke's listening to your eulogy again."

Steve had no idea what to say.

"I know it was something you had to do," Kayla said, sounding almost as if she was trying to convince herself. "Shane's alive because you did."

He stepped toward her and she must have sensed him, because she looked up at him. The light from the house reflected off the tears welling in her eyes.

"What I did, Sweetness, is make sure your sister didn't lose the man she loves," Steve said. "And I made sure Andrew and Jeannie didn't lose their papa. . . . It's not really that much different than what Shane did for me, first by pulling my sorry ass out of Lawrence's camp and then by jumping in front of Cal Winters' bullet."

Kayla sniffed. "So things came full circle today?"

"In a way, I guess," Steve replied. Then he took a deep breath. "I did what I thought I had to. I don't know how to change, Kayla. A lot of what happened that you just saw was instinct. There wasn't a lot of time to run through a bunch of plans. I had an idea and I rolled the dice. I know that's hard for you to hear, but it's what any of us would've done in the same situation."

He motioned back to the house.

"It's what we're all doing here. . . . You heard Tarrington." He stepped toward her again and reached for her hand with his good one. She seemed to begin to pull away, but stayed still. Steve squeezed her hand tightly. "We all know what could happen if this fails. The ISA could make all of our lives a living hell if this doesn't work, but that's not stopping us. I doubt any of us even hesitated -- well, Jack . . . maybe he did -- but not any of the rest of us." Steve had to grin slightly as he said softly, "Not you either. And you didn't hesitate when Cal Winters tried to shoot Andrew. So I think if you'd been in that room with Alamain and you thought stepping into that thing gave you a better chance of getting him to tell you where the antidote was . . . well, I think you'd have been right next to me in opening the door."

A tear slipped down Kayla's cheek. "It still scares me."

"I know it does, but I love you and Stephanie more than anything," Steve said. "So just remember that you're going to have to fight real hard to get rid of me."

"Dang. . . so does that mean we're gonna have to keep seeing that ugly mug at Christmas and Easter, Kay?"

Steve jumped at the sound of Bo's voice. Kayla broke into a little giggle and even Steve had to roll his eye. He made a point of scowling, when he turned around to face Bo, who was standing, arms-crossed, just inside the gate that led from Roman and Marlena's house. A little behind him was John, who seemed to be struggling not to smirk.

"Very funny, Beauregard," Steve said, though his tone was light. "Did you--"

Before he finished, Bo stepped to his side, revealing the short woman behind him.

Rachel Knight did not seem to appreciate Bo's and John's humor. She glared at Steve.

"Well what do we have here?" Steve said. He chuckled at her obvious discomfort and then looked at John. "You didn't have any trouble, did you?"

John shook his head. "Not at all. Once I mentioned how some certain pictures might find their way to the wire services, the lady was happy to join us."

"She don't look so happy to me," Bo muttered.

"I'm perfectly capable of speaking for myself," Rachel snapped. She continued to glare at Steve, only stopping momentarily to scowl at Kayla. "So what do you want from me?"

Chuckling some more, Steve wrapped an arm around Kayla's shoulders and grinned. "Do you remember when you first came by our apartment. You said you wanted to help Shane if you could. Well, here's your chance and, whether it's kicking and screaming or smiling happily, you're going to do exactly what we tell you."

[MrsM]

I hope their plan works!!

[fluffysmom]

What an emotional chapter. I hope the plan is successful.

[jwsel]

Chapter 536

"Daddy. . . ."

At Andrew's hesitant voice, Shane looked up from the story he had been reading to the boy. His head poking over the covers of his bed, Andrew was looking up with his big, dark eyes.

Setting the book down, Shane forced a small smile to his face. He had thought that reading a bedtime story might maintain a semblance of normalcy, but it was pretty clear that the story was the last thing on Andrew's mind.

"You have something you want to ask?"

Andrew frowned a little, then shook his head. "Not a question."

"So something you want to say?" Shane asked.

This time Andrew nodded. Shane waited patiently for Andrew to work out what to say.

"If any of the kids at school say you're a traitor, I'm gonna to tell them they're lying," Andrew said, his tone shifting from soft to defiant. "I'm gonna tell them you're a hero and you did the right thing to save Uncle Steve."

Shane started to answer, but his words caught in the back of his throat.

"And don't worry 'bout Mommy, Evie, and Jeannie." Andrew now gave Shane a very solemn look. "I'll protect them."

Fighting back the tears that stung at his eyes, Shane pulled Andrew into a tight embrace. He held the boy close, unable to speak for what felt like a long time before he finally said, "Now you listen to me, young man. . . . Your mother and Eve are adults who can look after themselves, and your uncles will be around to help. So your job while I'm gone is to mind your mother, go to school, and take your riding lessons. You hear me?"

He pulled back and looked down at Andrew, who nodded slowly and then said, "I'm going to miss you, Daddy."

"I know, Sport. . . . I'm. . . ." Shane pulled Andrew close again and said, "I'm going to miss you so much, Andrew."

From behind him, he heard Kim's voice. She sounded reluctant to interrupt as she called his name. "Shane?"

Letting go of Andrew, Shane looked over his shoulder at the door.

Kim looked back at him apologetically. "Mickey Horton is on the phone. He says he needs to speak with you right away."

Shane knew he had to take the call, but he hesitated. He did not want to leave Andrew.

"You take the call," Kim said, giving Shane a reassuring smile. She approached the bed and motioned to the book that Shane had set down. "I'll bet there is still some of this story to read tonight."

Changing places with Kim, Shane stood up and walked to the door. Kim was already finding the spot in the story where Shane had left off before he had reached the corridor. Deciding it would be best to take the call downstairs, he went down to the library and picked up the phone.

"Mickey?"

Mickey Horton sounded almost startled. "Shane, oh, I'm sorry. I was starting to wonder if Kim forgot I was on the phone."

"No," Shane said. "I was saying goodnight" -- goodbye -- "to Andrew just now and had to come downstairs."

"It's okay. Look, I just want to let you know there's been a slight change of plans for tomorrow. We need to be at the Salem P.D. headquarters at 9:45."

Shane thought that sounded odd. Why would they meet with the Assistant U.S. Attorney at the police station? Then it dawned on him. The ISA press conference was at 10 a.m. Tarrington probably wanted to keep an eye on Shane and make sure the plea deal went as planned. In fact, Tarrington probably would take advantage of the press conference to announce the deal.

"Shane, do you have that? Tomorrow at 9:45?"

The question interrupted Shane's thoughts and he replied, "Yes, Mickey. 9:45 a.m. at the police station." Hanging up, he looked at the clock on the table and saw that it was nearly 9 p.m.

Only 12 hours left.

Mickey had already explained that once Shane signed the paperwork with the AUSA, they would go to the Federal Courthouse where the plea would be entered formally, sentence would be pronounced, and then Shane would be remanded to the custody of the federal marshals. By this time the next night, Shane would be in a cell, possibly the one where he would stay for the next two years.

He reminded himself that he had been a prisoner before. Jericho had locked him up for a few months. It had not been close to two years, but back then he had no idea if he would manage to escape. He had spent that time wondering if he would ever see Kim or his children again.

This time, I know I will.

That would give him the strength to get through this. As he finished that thought, he realized he was not alone in the library. Turning to the door, he saw that Kim had followed him downstairs.

"Andrew?"

"Asleep," she said, walking toward him. "I think he was already pretty wrung out emotionally. He fell asleep almost as soon as I started reading."

Shane nodded. "It's hard for him. He told me not to worry, because he'll protect you and his sisters."

Kim smiled softly, but there was a little edge to her voice. "He takes after his dad that way. . . always wanting to protect everybody else."

"Kim--"

"I know." She sighed. She was now directly in front of him and reached out to take his hand. In a soft voice, she said, "It's hard for me too. And I think I know how you feel. I keep thinking about that night before I was sentenced for Emma's murder. I know it's not exactly the same. I mean, I didn't know exactly how long I'd been gone and it also wasn't like I had to say goodbye to the children. . . ."

Shane understood what she meant. When Kim had been convicted of killing Emma, Andrew was still missing.

"Still, I remember that fear of being locked up, away from everyone I knew and loved." Kim looked up at him and then lifted a hand to his cheek. "And I also remember what you gave me that night . . . how you showed me your love, and how it gave me so much strength, Shane."

Shane closed his eyes as she stroked his cheek. He remembered that night and how they had come together, reuniting finally after they had been driven apart by the pain and frustration of being unable to fight through the walls they had both kept putting up.

But we don't have those walls now, he told himself.

"You don't have to show me anything, Kim." He opened his eyes. "And I should make sure I've taken care of things for while I'm gone. There's a lot to figure out."

Kim shook her head. "No, there's not. You don't need to worry about me or the children," she said. "We'll manage just fine, not to mention I've got two brothers and Steve and Neil and a large part of Salem who'll do just about anything to make sure your family is okay."

"But there are the finances," he said. "Who's going to pay the mortgage? And the staff need paying. How will you access the bank accounts? You don't even know the combination of the safe, do you?" He started to pull her toward the wall where the safe was hidden. "Here, let me show you."

Kim jerked her hand free. "Stop it, Shane." Her eyes bore into him. "In the morning, before we go to the police station, we can have Mickey prepare a power of attorney. If there are other things we need, we'll deal with them. I survived with Andrew and Eve when you were gone before. I can take care of things."

Shane knew Kim was capable of caring for the children without him. That wasn't the point. "Kim," he started to protest, wanting to explain, but she cut him off.

"I know." She stepped toward him again and took his hand once more. "I love that you want to protect us and I'm sure you think, if you sit here all night, you'll plan for every possible thing that might happen in the next two years." She tilted her head and gave him a sad little smile. "But it'll be okay if you don't. I'll be just fine. Your children will be just fine."

Kim curled her hand inside his. Holding it to her breast, she turned in a semi-circle so that her back was to Shane and his arm was wrapped around her. She rested her head against Shane's chest.

In an almost-whisper, she said, "You need this night, Shane. . . ."

Her perfume -- a heady mix of rose and spices that she had purchased during their honeymoon in Paris -- seemed to make the room spin.

"We need this night," she whispered.

She pressed closer to him. Swaying slowly against him, she raised her free hand and grasped the top of his head. Kim looked up and their eyes met momentarily as she pulled his head down to hers, but Shane closed his eyes just before their lips met in a long, slow kiss that only stoked the fire growing inside him. They broke apart and she turned to face him, though her hand still clasped his. Both of them were almost breathless.

Kim opened her mouth to speak, to try to convince him some more, but he stopped her by brushing his index finger across her lips. They didn't need any more words, he thought, as he lowered her to the soft rug in front of the fire. They only needed each other and a night that Shane wished would last forever.

[fluffysmom]

So many emotions.

Looks like the morning will be very surprising for Shane and Kim. So glad they have a night together.

[jwsel]

Chapter 537

It's not time yet.

Kim tried to tell herself that it couldn't be morning even as she tried to ignore the incessant beeping of the alarm. She kept her eyes closed, hoping if she did, she would not have to face what the morning would bring.

Her effort was futile. As she lay, curled on her side, eyes closed, and trying to pretend the light was not beginning to stream through the curtains of the bedroom, she felt the same mix of fear, pain, and resignation that had filled her the day before. It was as if reality suddenly returned, destroying the short-lived fantasy that she and Shane had created to escape the real world for their last night together.

The night had been glorious. They had made love in front of the fire downstairs before retreating to the bedroom where they had let their passion and love control them. Over and over, Shane had taken her to the heights of pleasure and sent her soaring beyond even those heights. It was if that passion was a way of fighting off the fear and pain that they both felt, but needed to keep at bay for one, last desperate night. Neither of them had wanted it to end for that would mean facing reality once more. So they had made love, then Shane had held her as they curled together and fantasized about some happy future, and then they made love again. Finally, not long before the alarm sounded, when they had both been totally spent, Kim had fallen asleep, her head resting against Shane's chest. The sound of his beating heart drummed rhythmically and lulled her into an exhausted slumber.

The alarm continued to beep, so Kim gave up trying to ignore it. Groaning, she opened her eyes and reached over to turn it off. That was when she realized that she was alone in the bed.

She scanned the room, but there was no sign of Shane. There were no sounds coming from the bathroom either and, as she raised her head, she saw that the bathroom door was open and the light was off.

With a sigh, Kim forced herself to get out of bed. She figured Shane was downstairs, probably trying to make some last-minute financial plans or other arrangements for her and the children. On the one hand, she loved that he was so protective of them, but, on the other, she hated that he could not accept that she would be able to handle things in his absence.

Pulling a robe on, she exited the bedroom and started for the stairs, but stopped when she heard sounds coming from the nursery. She moved closer to the door and was about to go inside when she heard Shane's voice. He was speaking in a halting manner, almost choking on his words.

"-- you'll understand. When I get out. . . when I come home, I'll make it up to you, sweetheart, I promise."

Kim's chest tightened as she heard the pain in Shane's voice.

"I wish. . . ." There was a long pause. "Just know that Daddy loves you, and he didn't want to leave you . . . I'd do anything for it to be different, and I promise that I'll never leave you again. . . . Can you remember that, Jeannie? Can you. . . ." His voice broke and Kim could tell Shane was weeping as he choked out, "Can you remember that I love you and that I'll be back and I'll never ever leave you again?"

Tears were streaming down Kim's face as she cautiously poked her head around the edge of the door. She felt like she was intruding on something private and knew Shane would be embarrassed that anyone -- even Kim -- had seen him so emotionally open.

Shane had his back to the door. To Kim's surprise, he was standing with Jeannie in his arms and rocking back and forth. There was not a lot of light in the room, just what was seeping through the curtains, but it looked to Kim like Jeannie's head was resting against his shoulder. Kim could not tell if the little girl was asleep.

"That's right, Jeannie," Shane whispered just before he kissed the little girl on the top of her head. "Remember that Daddy loves you." He continued to rock her and murmur soft words that Kim could no longer hear.

Kim stepped back so that, if Shane turned, he would not see her eavesdropping. She backed down the hallway, called out his name, and waited for a response.

It took a moment -- Kim pictured Shane hastily trying to compose himself -- before he called out that he was in the nursery. She walked slowly down the hall to give him a little more time before she entered and feigned surprise at the sight of Shane holding Jeannie in his arms. He looked at her a little guiltily.

"I won't tell Marcus," she said lightly, referring to the restrictions the doctor still imposed on Shane lifting anything.

Shane sighed. "I figured this one time wouldn't do any real harm." He looked down at Jeannie. "I was sitting in bed and it hit me that I've never actually carried her since we found out. . . since I've known she's my little girl."

"She'll still be a little girl in two years," Kim assured him, but Shane shook his head.

"It won't be the same. She'll be three," he countered. Then, in a much lower voice, he added, "She won't even know me."

Kim walked forward until she was beside him. Now close, she could see that Jeannie was awake and had just been nestling calmly in her father's arms. Smiling softly, Kim reached out and stroked their daughter's hair. Jeannie raised her head and broke into a big wide-eyed grin at the sight of her mother. She squirmed sidelong and reached her arms out to Kim. With obvious reluctance, Shane let Kim take their daughter from him.

"Jeannie will know you, Shane," Kim said. "Every day you are gone, I'll remind her that you love her and that we'll all be together when you come home." As Jeannie stopped fussing and settled her head against Kim's shoulder, Kim forced herself to smile. "And like you said, she'll be three when you come home. When she's older, she'll barely have any memories of a time before her daddy was around, so you'll have plenty of time to be part of her life and show her how much you love her."

Kim wanted her words to give Shane the reassurance he needed and she was glad to see him nod. He turned away, put his hands on the rail of Jeannie's crib, and took a deep breath.

"I guess the alarm must have woken you?" he asked as he looked back around at her. When Kim nodded, he gave a half-hearted smile. "Shakespeare would have you arguing that we only heard a nightingale, not a lark, but I guess he never considered alarm clocks."

"We'll have plenty of nights and mornings together." Still holding Jeannie against her, Kim reached out with her hand and brushed his cheek. "The rest of our lives, Shane. You need to remember that. . . . As hard as this is for all of us, we're going to come out of it together and our love will be even stronger." She watched as Shane closed his eyes and leaned into her touch. "I don't want you to worry about us, even though I know it's pretty pointless to ask you not to. You wouldn't be the man I love if you didn't, but we'll be fine."

She started to pull her hand back, but Shane opened his eyes and took her hand in his. He seemed to study her hand for a moment before he spoke. "I know and I don't want you to think I doubt you. You are the strongest woman I've ever known, and I know the children are in good hands." He let go of her hand and added, "Maybe it's just easier to think about what needs to be done than dwelling on leaving you and the children."

Kim chose not to mention what she had witnessed between Shane and Jeannie earlier and how she knew that he was dwelling on leaving them. Instead, she tried to give him something to hold onto.

"When you think about me and the children, I don't want you to think about what might be wrong," she said. "I want you to think about taking the children riding across the grounds of Donovan Manor. Think about Eve's wedding, and the grand reception we'll host in the ballroom. That's why you're doing this -- so you can see your children grow up and be part of their lives."

Shane nodded a little.

"And I want you to remember last night," Kim continued, carefully choosing her words because Jeannie was still in her arms. "When you feel alone, I want you to think about how it felt to be together, just us, and how we will be together again. I know when I was in jail, that was enough to get me through the worst of times. Can you do that, Shane?"

There was a long pause. "I can," he finally said and looked at her, his eyes shining with love and something else -- appreciation, perhaps. Or admiration, she realized, as he said, "You really are an amazing person, Kimberly. How did I get so lucky to have you in my life?"

Kim leaned over and kissed his cheek. "I think we have a mutual admiration society going." When she pulled away, she said what she knew neither of them wanted to say. "You probably should get ready. It's almost time."

Shane chuckled slightly. "I guess I should figure out the proper attire for going to jail. Any thoughts?"

"I'm sure you'll do just fine," Kim said. "Why don't you go on and I'll get Jeannie dressed."

Shane gave Kim and then the little girl each a kiss before he left the room. Once he was gone, Kim closed her eyes and forced herself not to cry. She did not want Shane to hear. He needed her to be strong today. There would be time enough for tears during the next two years.

Taking a deep breath, Kim looked down at Jeannie, who was staring back up at her with her big green eyes. "Come on, sweetie," Kim said, nearly choking on each word. "Let's get you ready so you can say goodbye to Daddy."

[gapeach]

I can't wait until the next chapter. This is going to be good!!!

[MrsM]

Ugh, so heartbreaking!!

[fluffysmom]

It was heartbreaking listening to Shane tell his tiny daughter goodbye.

[jwsel]

Chapter 538

Steve sat silently in the rocking chair watching his daughter sleep. Despite the lack of sleep over the last 48 hours, he had awoken early, and his anticipation of what the day would bring had not allowed him to go back to sleep.

Not wanting to wake up Kayla, who had been exhausted the night before, he had crept quietly to his daughter's room. It was one of his favorite pleasures in life, watching his daughter peacefully asleep in her crib, her soft sighs the only sound in the room.

As he looked around the room, he smiled softly to himself. Unless they had another girl, they were definitely going to have to find a bigger apartment. The room was awash in pinks and dolls and everything a little girl would want. Not that it really mattered, but after growing up in an orphanage, Steve wanted his kids to have their own space to call their own.

Through the partially open doorway, Steve heard Kayla stirring in the bedroom. As he got up from the rocking chair he heard another sound, the one that signaled that his unborn child was once again playing havoc with his or her mother's stomach.

Moving carefully to avoid waking Stephanie, Steve walked to the bathroom. As he expected, Kayla was there, crouched over the toilet in the midst of another bout of morning sickness. Silently, he took a washcloth and ran it under the cold water from the sink. Then wringing it out, he placed it on the back of Kayla's neck, holding it there until the spasm subsided.

Kayla sat up and then slumped against the wall of the bathroom. Steve handed her the washcloth, which she used to wipe her face and mouth.

"Better?" he asked, looking at her with concern.

Kayla nodded. "At least until your kid decides to reject another meal."

"My kid?" Steve chuckled as he sat down beside Kayla. "I don't think I can take full credit, Sweetness. I'm pretty sure his mama had something to do with it too."

"His?" Kayla raised her brow. "You think it's a boy?"

Steve shrugged. "I don't know. It just seems to fit for some reason. You know that I don't care either way. Just as long as he -- or she -- is happy and healthy."

Kayla slowly got up before speaking. "I know. I feel the same way. But I have to agree that calling the baby 'him' does seem to fit."

"Well, I guess we'll find out one way or another in a few months, huh?" Steve said, rising to his feet.

"I just hope he has stopped waking up me like this by then," Kayla replied, as she left the bathroom and returned to the bedroom.

"Me too," Steve said, sincerely. "As excited as I am about this baby, I sure wish you didn't have to go through all this."

Kayla smiled and shook her head. "It's okay. It's really not that bad. And it's definitely all worth it."

"If you say so, baby." Steve was not convinced. He could see that Kayla was still tired. "Maybe you should stay home today. I've got everything covered."

Kayla whirled around and Steve nearly laughed at the determination in her eyes. "There is no way I'm missing anything today," Kayla said. "There is way too much at stake for everybody, and I'm certainly not going to stay home just because of a little morning sickness."

Steve held up his hands in mock surrender. His shoulder ached and he probably should have been wearing a sling on the arm, but he never liked appearing injured. So he covered the pain. "All right, Sweetness. I just want to make sure you're okay. But if you want to be there, I know better than to try and stop you."

Kayla's expression softened. "I appreciate that. But I need to be there today to see it all finally end. Just think, if everything goes right, after today, we can finally start focusing on the future."

Steve smiled and pulled Kayla into his arms. "That's right, baby. And I have a feeling that future is going to be pretty bright."

Kayla smiled and kissed his cheek and nestled into his arms, avoiding the spot where he had been shot. As he held his wife, Steve silently prayed that the day would go as planned. Although he had put on a brave face for his wife, Steve knew that there was real danger for all of them today. If his plan didn't work, there was no doubt that Tarrington would make them all suffer. Shane would go to jail, probably for a lot longer than the two years he had been promised, and Steve, Roman, and John would likely face the wrath of the ISA in whatever legal, or not so legal, manners Tarrington chose.

For just a moment, Steve's determination wavered. Maybe he should call the whole thing off rather than risk all of their lives in that way. The thought of being taken away from Kayla, Stephanie, and the unborn baby that was currently nestling between him and Kayla was horrifying. But no sooner did that thought make it's way to Steve's conscience mind than he banished it. Shane had risked his life to save Steve in that raid, and there was no way Steve was going to let Shane burn for that, especially because Steve himself had provided Tarrington with the ammunition to do it.

No, Steve thought silently, absently kissing the top of Kayla's head. He had told Kayla the night before that none of them had hesitated in choosing to join the plan, and he was going to see it through. This time it would be Tarrington who would find out what it felt like to be manipulated and used as a pawn. Hell, Steve was willing to go through with the plan just for that little bit of satisfaction alone.

With that thought leaving a smile on his face, Steve lifted his head and waited until Kayla met his eyes. "As much as I'd love to stand here like this all day, baby, we need to get moving."

Kayla nodded and moved out of his arms. "I'll go get in the shower." Her smile turned sexy. "Don't suppose you want to join me?"

Steve shook his head with genuine regret. "Not this time, baby. I want to call Mickey and make sure he reached Shane last night. We can't have this party without the guest of honor." Then he let his eye drift down his wife's body. "But I'm definitely taking a rain check."

"I'm going to hold you to that," Kayla replied as she moved toward the bathroom. Steve's eye followed her until he disappeared. Then he sighed and reached for the phone. Time to put the wheels in motion.