It’s Depressing Night on Dancing with the Stars………
Tonight the stars are supposed to share a deep emotion from the most memorable event in their lives. Brooke Charvet reminds us to grab a box of tissues, because we’re gonna need them. I really hope she’s wrong, because I seriously don’t want a headache from crying. Plus, I hate it when my eyes get all puffy.
Let the depression begin!
Rob and Cheryl (Foxtrot) – The most memorable time in Rob’s life was the death of his father (OJ lawyer, Rob Kardashian Sr), so he, Rob Jr, has decided to honor him by dancing a foxtrot to Sr’s favorite Sinatra song. Let’s see how he does…..I gotta say, it ain’t terrible. Cheryl is still leading ALL of it (no surprise there) but he seems a lot more relaxed and he does seem to be improving. He was a bit too “into” Cheryl at some parts and it just didn’t seem to fit. But overall, I didn’t hate it. And that’s saying a lot, since I hate the Kardashians with a fiery passion.
My Score: 7 Judges Score: 8, 8, 8 24/30
There was a commercial for “The Chew.” Do the folks at ABC actually think people are going to watch it?!? Out of soap opera solidarity, I vow to NEVER watch. I encourage you to do the same. Onward to the dancing…..
Chynna and Tony (Rumba) – Chynna says her most memorable time was 1990 when Wilson Philip’s first album (that’s like a CD for you young folks) came out. The first hit single “Hold On” (most awesomest song EVER, if I do say so myself, and also a favorite of mine from back in middle school) was written at a time when she was dealing with a lot of pain from the abandonment of her father. Side note, she is still soooo pretty! I can’t believe how gorgeous she is! Side side note, the other two from Wilson Philips are in the audience! How sweet! Ok, back to the dancing. Their rumba was lovely, even if her legs were WAY too stiff. And it seemed to capture some of the emotion that the she is singing about. Unfortunately, now when I hear that song all I can think about is “Bridesmaids.” If you’ve seen it, you know what I mean. Oops, off topic again. Back to the dancing! Overall, it was very nice, but she was too stiff and was trying to be too perfect. If she’d just let go, I think she’d be much better. When you dance, you can’t worry about being “right.” You have to feel the emotion and express it. She was too worried about foot/arm placement to be able to do that. Otherwise, it was very nice.
My Score: 8 Judges Score: 8, 9, 9 26/30
Chaz and Lacey (Rumba) – I can’t imagine what Chaz will express, because it’s not like he’s gone through any hard times in his life.
The song is an old one from Sonny Bono that, to Chaz, says “If you have a problem with me, that’s your problem.” Lacey is doing her best Cher impression (dressed in white fringe, a la Gypsy Cher) and Chaz is doing his best tree impression (in that he’s not really moving at all). He said something during rehearsal that he only learned it 2 days ago. Assuming he actually means Saturday, it shows. Man, that was T-E-R-R-I-B-L-E!!! I feel bad for him. Carrie Ann thought the same as me, but Len thought it was his best dance yet.
My Score: 5 Judges Score: 6, 6, 6 18/30
Routine is at 2:11.
Kristin and Mark (Samba) – Kristin says her most memorable year was 2005 when she graduated high school and moved to LA to pursue a career in entertainment. Insert eye roll here. Then again, I guess a privileged 24 year old hasn’t really had a lot of time to have any real memorable experiences. Whatever. The dancing begins and WOW! She is a BAD dancer. And not just kinda bad, REALLY BAD. Not a whole lot of actual Samba in there either. Lots of hairography and booby shaking. Mark should be ashamed of himself. Ugh. This was painful to watch. Len thought it was 20% Beyonce and 80% Samba. I’m seriously not sure what show he’s watching. Bruno and Carrie Ann also thought it was fabulous. What the…?
Seriously, what now??? This is insanity.
My Score: 4 Judges Score: 8, 8, 8 24/30
Carson and Anna (Tango) – 2003 is Carson’s most memorable year because “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” came out and he was finally out and proud. The time it took me to type that sentence is the same amount of time they gave to his rehearsal footage. Oh well. The dance is fun though and I almost don’t even mind that Anna is leading this whole thing or that Carson’s frame is awful. The idea of the routine is Carson is lusting after Anna’s shoes (can you say stereotype?) but it’s just so dog-gone adorable, I laugh right along with them. Bruno thought it was insanely brilliant. Or was that just insane? Carrie Ann loves him. Even Len liked it.
My Score: 7 Judges Score: 8, 7, 8 23/30
Dance starts at 2:14, but the rehearsal footage is worth a look. It’s pretty funny.
JR and Karina (Rumba) – JR’s most memorable year was (no surprise here) the year he was injured in Iraq. They showed some pics of him from before the injuries, and oddly enough, I think he’s better looking now. Is that weird? Maybe it’s just his maturity but he’s definitely more attractive now than before. They are dancing to the song from Tim McGraw “If You’re Reading This” which is about the letters some soldiers send in the event of their death. JR wants to dance this in honor of all the folks that don’t make it home. Cue waterworks! *Stops typing to watch dance* Wow. Just wow. That was super amazing and at times it looked like JR was lost in the emotion and I don’t blame him. He was visibly trembling at the end and so was everyone else. Carrie Ann was crying (so was I). Then JR was crying. Then Karina was crying. Then everyone was crying. So, not only was the performance really good, the dancing was actually good too. His lines were excellent and his hip movement was really good. This may become my most favorite dance of the season. And it’s only week 3!!
My Score: 10 Judges Score: 9, 8, 9 26/30
After watching it again this morning, I stand by my 10. This was just fantastic on every level.
Nancy and Tristan (Waltz) – Nancy’s memorable year was the year her twins were born. The babies were born early because it was an emergency C-Section. The doctors were saying that they didn’t know if the girl, Lucy, was going to survive. But sorry, Nancy. There’s just no topping JR’s dance. They should really just call it a night. Nancy’s dance was sad, but for all the wrong reasons. It was so bad. I know this is a special song for her (“Moon River”) but that dance was really bad. Oh dear.
My Score: 5 Judges Score: 7, 7, 7 21/30
Ricki and Derek (Rumba) – Apparently last year was Ricki’s most memorable because she got divorced and watched her house burn down, but then managed to meet a great guy. So she is dancing to “Gravity” (also known as the Addiction dance from SYTYCD). I didn’t buy it. Because I’m so familiar with that song and the very specific routine from SYTYCD, I was unable to get into this one. On any level. It just didn’t fit for me. Sorry.
My Score: 6 (only because she wasn’t terrible, even if it didn’t work for me) Judges Score: 9, 9, 9 27/30 You’ve gotta be kidding me! They thought this was better than JR?!?! This is why I (at times) really hate this show. Argh.
And now for comparison, this is the SYTYCD routine I mentioned. The girl in the piece is fighting her addiction (the guy). It was choreographed by the ever-fabulous Mia Michaels.
Ok, back to DWTS.
Hope and Maks (Cha Cha) – He’s so pretty. Oops. Got sidetracked. My bad. Hope’s most memorable year was this year and losing at the World Cup. I’m not really sure how the routine goes with her memorable year, but it gave us a chance to watch sexy Maks, which is never bad. But, sadly this routine was not good. She’s a typical stiff jock and is just NOT a graceful dancer. Too bad, because Maks deserves a good dancer and one he can get sexy with and he’s clearly not attracted to her.
My Score: 7 (some of the actual Cha Cha wasn’t too bad) Judges Score: 8, 8, 8 24/30
Dance at 2:01
David and Kym (Rumba) – David’s memorable year was this past year when his marriage fell apart and he went to rehab. But ultimately, this year was about his daughter and how much he loves her. Very sweet. David is doing his best Maks impression (dancing with the open shirt) and Courtney/Monica doesn’t let her botox-frozen face reveal anything she’s feeling. It was a nice routine, but not spectacular. Although I like David, so I want him to do well.
My Score: 7 Judges Score: 8, 8, 8 24/30
My LeaderboardJR………………….....10
Chynna……………..8
Rob………………… ..7
Carson…………….7
Hope……………… ..7
David……………….7
Ricki………………...6
Chaz………………...5
Nancy……………..5
Kristin……………4
Judges LeaderboardRicki………………..27
JR…………………… ..26
Chynna…………...26
Rob……………….....24
Hope………………...24
David………………..24
Kristin…………….24
Carson…………….23
Nancy……………..21
Chaz………………...18
I don’t know what world these judges live in, but there is NO WAY Ricki’s dance was better than JR’s. NO friggin WAY!!!
MY PREDICTION:
Bottom three: Chaz, Nancy, Kristin
Going Home: Nancy